Cutting back and forth to the moving shot doesn’t flow well. You can clearly tell it’s one shot interrupted and it’s jarring. I would instead place the shot of the “captain” immediately after the shot of Kylo going around the table then cut to the shot of Kylo walking past Pryde.

And no, the shot you have there doesn’t really work, but I get what you’re saying. You absolutely picked the best one you could from the movie itself. The footage you need for this scene to work doesn’t exist. My mind immediately jumps to cosplay. They wear masks so anyone can do it. Here’s a two second shot of Adam Savage as the coolest knight (seriously, why didn’t they give Kylo that mask?!) with another beside him. It’s roughly the same length as the shot you used but more clearly communicates that the knight is talking whereas in yours the knight is shot like a silent background character. Just blacken out Adam Savage’s eyes under the mask and color grade the non-descript elevator bluish grey and it could work. You could also do like they did with the Tusken Raiders in ANH and loop the clip a little since it’s so short. You obviously have to cut before he grabs the George Lucas cosplayer.