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Post #1576972

Author
RogueLeader
Parent topic
The Last Jedi: Stoic Edition (WIP)
Link to post in topic
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/1576972/action/topic#1576972
Date created
4-Feb-2024, 5:39 PM

Here was the outline of ideas I had regarding it.

During the Maz Hologram:

Maybe Maz could say “there’s only one guy I KNOW” rather than one guy she “trusts”.

When 3PO says, “oh my” before his close-up, perhaps you could add a line from Maz saying that he is wanted in twenty systems. Something about him being a wanted man could explain why he chooses to sleep in a prison for safety or something, and why he keeps a low profile.

New C-3PO line: How do we find this Master Codebreaker?

Cut the line/shot of Maz saying, “Oh yes, he can.”

Keep the shot of Rose and Finn giving each other that look, but have put a Maz new line over it.
New Maz line: He’ll find you…

Briefly keep following shot of Maz just saying, “In the casino-“ and continue scene as-is. So nothing about the red plom bloom.

Maybe cut the scene of cops looking at Finn and Rose’s ship, unless you can think of a new line that would fit the alien here. Maybe something like, “Our client is looking for two humans who landed their shuttle here. They likely went up to the casino.”

Cut the shot/line where Rose mentions looking for the red plom bloom.

Replace Finn saying, “Zero red plom blooms” with something that matches his mouth movements. Something like, “We’ve covered this whole casino, no luck/zero luck/nothing, etc.”

When BB-8 rolls up to them on the balcony, have Finn or Rose off screen say, “Security?”

Then when they are running back into the casino, cut around all of the red plom bloom/Master Codebreaker stuff. Maybe have Finn say, “We gotta get out of here” as they are running. Then, they get caught. The alien can say, “There they are! Put them with our friend in cell 4EB!” (You don’t have to do these lines exactly, just depends on how obvious you want to make it)

Then, when they’re in the cell, replace DJ’s line, “Uh, I can do it” with something like, “Looking for me?”

Replace Finn saying, “Did he just-?” with “Is he the-?”

There’s opportunity to change other lines but I think these would be the big needed changes at least. And then, later when Poe asks if they found the Master Codebreaker, Finn needs to say yes.