I like all of that quite a bit. I’d have to double check the scenes to make sure there is enough room for them to be spoken, though.

As for the final line, we can look back at what Nev wrote originally as a baseline:

“You were created to sit upon the throne of the Sith, a vessel for the Emperor’s conjured spirit. But we share an unbreakable bond, stronger than he can imagine. We can kill him, Rey, destroy the Sith…and use his power to forge something new.”

Worth noting that the term “dyad” would be excised in this instance so Rey is at least a little less special. I really love the dyad concept, but it makes less sense without the mirroring of the grandson of Vader and the granddaughter of Palpatine being there. They can still have a strong bond, but it just won’t be named to make this scene less exposition-heavy.

My idea was to replace a Finn line that was removed in v2(?) of Ascendant: “To bring the little girl that he was supposed to bring from Jakku, to the Emperor. To absorb her life-Force.” (Poe then exhales in horror). Both Poe and Finn have already seen Rey transfer life-Force, so this would make sense. This way there isn’t a misunderstanding that he wanted her alive, and we expect Palpatine to drain her immediately upon reaching Exegol, but he tries the possession thing instead first. We might have to cut out Palpatine’s line about “a dyad in the Force, unseen for generations”, but everything else he says is fine since we would be aware of the fact he can use this power regardless of a “dyad”.