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Post #1565861

Author
arabian
Parent topic
The Jedi, The Witch, and the Warlord (Ahsoka Movie Edit) [Released]
Link to post in topic
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/1565861/action/topic#1565861
Date created
22-Nov-2023, 9:36 AM

I watched it and overall it’s very well done. I do have notes:

  • The crawl itself is great, but it just feels wrong not having the regular SW intro. You said you want this to be like a SW film, so why not begin it thus? Have the “A long, long time ago, far, far away…” with the SW theme, and SW/Ahsoka title? And then could you start it with the SW theme and then segue into that eerie music.
  • There isn’t normally a wipe after the crawl, the ship should just fly into the space. However…
  • If you want to shave more time and get right into it, you could go from the crawl into the ship approaching that starts at 1:55 then go inside the Alliance ship: “Ship approaching.” It immediately sets up a sense of tension that way and cuts an unnecessary extra bit at the beginning. It works dialogue-wise too.
  • Great cut from Morgan to Ahsoka. Nice, tight pacing in the rescue scene and first Ashoka scene. Fantastically-done.
  • After Clancy Brown laughs nervously after calling Sabine Wren’s name twice, I think you can just cut the scene to 10:29 (where we see the back of the lothal cat), and then the door opens and… there is Sabine Wren. That creates this perfect little cut and intro to her.
  • This Sabine slower scene with the Ezra holo works really nicely to slow the pace here. And it’s a much nicer intro to the characters, makes her more likable at the outset than the series did.
  • OK, this is where cutting out the New Republic stuff is an issue. Where, when did Ahsoka and Hwang find out about the lightsabers in this edit? That came completely out of left field and for someone who hadn’t watched the series they’d be WHA?! How did they know? If you could add in a bit of the NR stuff there just to get the info to Ahsoka that would work.

Overall, again, this is really good. Introduces your antagonists and protagonists beautifully. Sets up the plot well. It’s tight, focused, good action, with a few scenes to slow things down. The only issue is how did Ahsoka know about the lightsabers. Other than that (and I threw in my few recommended small cuts), this is looking really, really good so far.