I definitely think ‘despair’ is stronger than ‘sorrow’. This is the state of the Galaxy - the loss of the Jedi would be more of an ‘oh fuck, anything bad could happen’ rather than a big ol’ boo hoo. I also think ‘facing extinction’ is stronger than ‘emboldened by absence’ (and the emboldening is implied enough either way). Those first two paragraphs I think Nev is right to have locked in.

That said, I don’t think ‘chaos’ is quite the right move (in the same way that I don’t think ‘overwhelming’ is) for the state of the Republic/Senate. Yes, the First Order have emerged, and they are ‘claiming supremacy’ over space BEYOND the NR, but I don’t think they’re an immediate threat to the NR. That’s why I think it’s valuable to emphasise that the scale of the threat is unknown (potentially huge). The NR doesn’t want to react in a panic, both because this might turn out to be manageable, and because it equally might turn out to be an existential threat - so that’s what’s causing at least a frustrating indecision and political deadlock. My feeling is that the NR would be paralysed by endless debates because (1) they don’t have enough information, and (2) a mis-step could be very costly both in terms of pissing off the FO and causing panic amongst the populace. Thus, our ‘brave’ senators decide that they have to urgently act (and without support), risking exposure and a reaction from the FO, for the sake of gaining hope, and more information.

Perhaps ‘fearing the scale’ could be worded better, but I feel like that concept is right for the third paragraph’s first couple of lines.