Not sure I am a fan of “dark” in the first line and then “darkening” in the last line.

The more I think of it too, as much as I’d like the crawl to have the New Republic secretly supporting the Resistance, it just clouds it up too much in exposition.

In the context of the Resistance being a militia, that already establishes they are separate from the “fragile New Republic”, and with the Leia deleted scene restored and Hux’s speech, I think it would be easily assumed for first-time viewers that Leia is getting some secret help from her friends in the Senate to fund the militia.

With that in mind, I suggest:

Amidst this rising threat,
only a daring militia
stands in RESISTANCE,
its brave pilots have been
sent across the galaxy
to find the last Jedi and
restore the light of hope
to the darkening stars….