Here is why I wrote mine the way I did:

Luke Skywalker has vanished.
Without the legendary Jedi
Master’s presence, the galaxy
has fallen into despair.

Establishes Luke’s legend. Leaves out stuff about rebuilding the order as he already did, Ben/Kylo blew that up. Makes clear that without Luke, the galaxy is already losing hope and allowing dark forces to rise.

Rising from the shadows
of a hidden fortress,
sinister agents of the
fallen Empire have reformed
as the evil FIRST ORDER,
conquering worlds far beyond
the reach of the fragile
NEW REPUBLIC government.

Explains that the First Order has a “hidden fortress” (Starkiller) and is made from remnants of the Old Empire. The New Republic is frail and the First Order is starting to conquer easy targets.

Desperate to aid these
besieged systems, the
RESISTANCE, an unauthorized
military force, has been
searching for the last
Jedi, hoping his return will
restore peace and justice
to the darkening stars…

Defines the Resistance as being separate from the New Republic, and that they are searching for Luke to help bring back the Jedi and to aid the planets the First Order is attacking.

Paragraph 1: Explain Luke’s absence and role in the galaxy
Paragraph 2: Establish the First Order and state of the galaxy
Paragraph 3: Establish the Resistance and their mission