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Post #1520774

Author
EddieDean
Parent topic
The Force Awakens: Starlight (V1.1 Released!)
Link to post in topic
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/1520774/action/topic#1520774
Date created
24-Jan-2023, 11:44 AM

That’s lovely - but I think the middle sentence has a little ambiguity at the end with how it’s broken by commas. I might just lightly rearrange it:

Fearing that the sinister
FIRST ORDER, heir to the
fallen Galactic Empire,
are behind this catastrophe,
a few desperate Senators
have secretly called upon
an intrepid RESISTANCE
to search for the last Jedi
in their domain of evil.

I’d also perhaps change ‘his’ darkening stars to ‘the’, just to remove the personal connection.