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Post #1510927

Author
arabian
Parent topic
Community Focus Thread 1: The Phantom Menace
Link to post in topic
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/1510927/action/topic#1510927
Date created
7-Nov-2022, 11:03 PM

I like the idea, but I agree too many short scenes. I’d arrange it a little differently and cut a bit more:

  • Begin with the crawl, scroll down in space to the ship.
  • Cut the stuff with the captain/Nute Gunray/etc.
  • First interior shot should just be Qui-Gonn/Obi-Wan enter, what’s in the mock-up is good. They should be our first characters we see.
  • Move on to Gunray talking to Palpy as we saw in the mock-up, then go from that to a cut where they are told they have the transmission from Amidala.
  • Then to Amidala talking to the Jedi Council which gives us a nice flow. Which then ends with them discussing “that can only mean invasion” which leads to -->
  • Then the ship explosion, but no need to show the captain/co-captain, all we need is to see the exterior/explosion.
  • And then to the Jedi reaction/fight.

All of that flows and shouldn’t have the choppy feel to it. (I don’t think.)