This sounds interesting! I thought Holdo was an interesting character and the way she was used to show Poe that he can’t have heroics without leadership was really good - what’s your motivation behind her removal? And I’m also curious about your removal of the bombing run.
Like Rose, Holdo was a character I felt was detrimental to the storyline and was only there for the sake of forced conflict that easily could of been avoided.
Holdo refuses to tell the crew about the plan as the fleet diminishes —> Poe and other members of the crew mutiny for the sake of the Resistance.
Leia tells Poe the plan later in the film —> Poe now understands what the plan is and agrees with it.
Since Rose was also removed in this edit, her sister had to be removed as well, which meant cutting out the bombing run due to her involvement in it.