Very good, and well done, Spence! That was about as good of a single-film presentation or the series as it is as would be possible to put together. It felt solid, and felt right. The thoughts below are meant to vet it even so, of course.
- I wonder if the opening shot could begin after the pan downward has finished, and looped or stretched to be longer. In other words, to open on a locked shot from the ground which holds a few seconds.
- I believe we meet Lola when we meet Ned-B, and are to assume she’d been in Leia’s pocket the whole time. It was a shame not to keep the dialogue about the Force feeling like turning on the light, so I wonder about how introducing Lola earlier, perhaps when Ben tells her “no noise from that” on city-world, or when Needles breaks her first.
- The series appeared to dance around using the Imperial March, but I feel like making an exception for Vader is right. However, the use of the March for the Inquisitor fortress right after we meet Freck does not involve Vader so I’d suggest removing it from this scene.
- Was a shame to skip the tension of the troopers riding along with Ben and Leia and the ad libbed conversation about her mother. However, it’s removed cleanly.
- I believe Leia asks Reva how Ben died, but that we had not been shown Reva telling her this to begin with.
- Ben gives Leia Lola back at the end, but I don’t think we see that she’d given her to him beforehand.
- The iris transition into end credits is in the wrong direction.
This pretty much mirrors my thoughts. Not having the dialogue about the Force feeling like turning on the light is a big one for me. I also miss the fact that Ben’s first time using the Force is to save Leia, but unfortunately I don’t see a way to bring that back without bringing back the rooftop chase.
I noticed that Tala seems taken aback and asks “what are they keeping down there?” in fortress Inquisitorius but we never see the Jedi tomb, so I’d cut out that reference.
I think the way we are introduced to Leia is a bit odd. To me, the fact that we meet young Leia at all in this series/movie is a big surprise and should be built up that way for the audience. That we just kind of go there and meet Leia in media res feels anticlimactic. I would like to see her introduction reinstated.
Overall, I think the ideal cut of this series would sit at around three hours for me, whether that’s in one part or two.