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Post #1487521

Author
GLogus
Parent topic
The Force Awakens: Starlight (V1.1 Released!)
Link to post in topic
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/1487521/action/topic#1487521
Date created
6-Jun-2022, 8:06 AM

Why not put a brief pause in this line. Doing so makes it come across as if he’s saying it with more trepidation:

“Sir, about the girl. They say that she’s dangerous, that she has powers…like yours.”

And:

“Her powers are only beginning to awaken. The longer it takes to find her, the more dangerous she becomes.”

Too on the nose??

Or:

“She’s only begun to grasp the fullness of her powers. The longer it takes to find her, the more dangerous she becomes.”