That’s an interesting idea about trimming Bane’s short-lived infiltration. On the one hand it’s quite ballsy, which could add to Bane’s competence. But on the other, as you say, it’s a little absurd and redundant. Removing it would make the tradeoff that Anakin makes more impactful, which is the key emotional point of the episode.
I think rather than making Bane seem competent, it makes everyone else seem incompetent. Bane just kicks Ahsoka in the gut and makes a B line for the nearest cockpit and somehow he’s able to escape.
I will check over it. But if the characters are dependent on knowing Bane escaped and I can’t find an alternative, it’ll have to stay.
On a separate note, I feel like this duology would be the perfect place to introduce the concept of the scum and villany rising in the galaxy. I mean, we get a bunch of scummy bounty hunters taking hostages and kidnaping kids. It works as a precursor of things to come in Season 2.
This is a bit of a general thought but, have you considered doing an “alternate” version of the opening that only has one wall of text instead of two? There’s some episodes where having two feels justified to lay the groundwork, but for others it feels more like you’re using the text to fill the space, rather than using the space to fit the text. Sometimes they include bits that are already stated clearly in the episode itself, or they explain things that don’t feel like they need such thorough explaining. It can end up feeling more like you’re explaining the thought process behind the edits you made to the episode, rather that a natural introduction to what we’re about to see.
I don’t think I’ll do this. In general I’ve been very pleased with what I’ve been able to achieve with the opening text, and don’t feel like I’ve used anything extraneous just to pad it out. Where it (pre)repeats content from the episode, that’s done to help reinforce that theme for the viewer in a way that I think is helpful, and where I don’t have too much to say about the episode, I think there’s value in highlighting the current state of the Galaxy. I also think that if I introduced two standards it might generate some confusion for the viewer.
That said, if any of my wording does feel too ‘fanedity’ then let me know, because I can tighten and revise them.