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Star Wars merchandise we'll never see

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What are Star Wars products you think will never see the light of day? Here are some of my ideas...


1. Chef Boyardee Tauntaun Guts Pasta
2. Victoria's Secret Princess Leia metal bikinis
3. Jar Jar toilet paper
4. A 500 page History of the Trade Federation book
5. Jar Jar pinata
6. Jar Jar dart board with sound effects (says phrases like "Mesa gonna die!" and "Ouchie, mesa in pain!!!)
7. The original original Star Wars trilogy on DVD
8. Screenwriting for Dummies by George Lucas
9. scale replica of the Millenium Falcon
10. Jabba the Hutt's Guide to Weight Loss book
11. The Ewok Adventure Part 3
12. Quotable Star Wars Prequels book
George Lucas was seduced by the dark side. The OOT ceased to exist in his mind and became the Special Editions...." "They're more maching now than movies. Twisted and evil."
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Baron Papodiona Action Figure (I may be wrong) a figure of George will sell bucket loads over at TF.n
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The people at TF.N will buy anything George throws at em'. I try to stay as far as possible away from them.
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That Victoria's Secret Leia bikini is an awesome idea, though. The day those are released, I'm dragging my girlfriend to good ol' VS.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Originally posted by: Adamwankenobi
The people at TF.N will buy anything George throws at em'. I try to stay as far as possible away from them.


Oh you dirty liar - you're one of them!

How about Beru's Blue Milk? Secret family recipe, but damn it would be tasty. Kind of like the milk leftover from Booberry cereal. That is, if I could get Booberry cereal anymore. I live in Canada. We just got cable last week.
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I didn't know any place made Booberry anymore. At least, I haven't seen it in a while.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Yeah, we can only get Count Chocula up here...no more Frankenberry or Frute Brute.

And to get back on topic, we'll likely never see C3PO's...lamentably. They were the best fucking cereal on the planet.

EDIT - sorry for all the fould language in my posts tonight. Cassidy+beer = sweary.
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Dude, that thing is always by my side. I even smoke it in Church. Let me tell you - the book of Revelations is awesome when you're hepped up on good 'ol street crack.
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I'll bet. I'm going to have to try that sometime. I can only imagine the visions of revelations (hmm...) when your high.