The issue is, of course, the footage and the music. Only “I am all the Sith!” and the back half of “…scavenger girl is no match for the power in me.” have shots of Palpatine’s face, unfortunately; so one of those has to be his last line - unless you choose to put “you are nothing” over the tension-building silence before Rey speaks.
My previous mockup was just done messily in stereo and with music from the OST, so it wasn’t usable in a 5.1 edit. It also noticeably omitted Palpatine’s final thrust of lightning just prior to the big pause and Rey’s lines. Thus, I have produced a second mockup.
This one is clearly much worse paced, with a big awkward silence, but that’s because I’ve kept it 100% in sync with the original version of the sequence for now in order to keep the music entirely intact. The big thing I did with this mockup (besides 5.1) is to combine the ending of the original “I am all the Sith!” Palpatine shot with the “…scavenger girl…” shot, so I could have Palpatine still do his big blast of electricity.
I’ve been messing with “I’m a Jedi” for ages and also am never satisfied with it. No matter how much I shift and fade the clipped up bits of the line, it still sounds hurried - or, at worst, like she’s saying “I’m the Jedi” or bizarrely even “I’m with Jedi”. There’s certainly no way to get her to sound defiant or triumphant saying it, unless you totally replace it, because the original line is said with a sort of subdued surprise.
I think pacing-wise the only issue is a slightly too long gap before “I am all the Sith” and then a much too short gap before “A scavenger girl…” Don’t know how easy it is to play around with, haven’t looked at the scene, but those two things would do it I think.
As for “I’m a Jedi,” honestly I think it sounds totally fine, and I can be picky. I don’t hear “the Jedi” or “with Jedi” at all, even when I specifically try to hear for it. I really don’t think it’d be possible to frankenbite her saying with other sources without it sounding really obvious. Here, the emotion isn’t 100% right but it’s still assertive enough to fit the moment.
DZ-330 said:
I think putting “you are nothing” over the silence would be a good idea as Rey would respond more quickly to saying she’s is a Jedi, which I think helps even more to remove the Endgame-ness of it. Are you able to mock that up?Sure. Here’s a mockup with “You are nothing!” shifted a little later to alleviate the awkward silence, and here’s one with it shifted all the way to the end as DZ suggests. (Edit: maybe it’s a little quiet there, but you get the idea)
I honestly had the thought to put “You are nothing” last earlier, but kind of dismissed it. And maybe there’s a way to make it work but I don’t know. The way it’s said is a little throwaway, and putting it on that shot of Rey just makes it seem even more throwaway.