I’ve always thought Boba Fett was a cool looking character with an interesting background, so i never really cared about his fate, but Mandalorian changed that for me, & i would like to see it reflected in his ‘death scene’. i think your edit is really close to what i would do (if i could get a video editing, please god give me a video editor lol), but i would remove his shot at luke, i don’t like han repeating ‘boba fett’ twice, so removing the shot helps remedy that.

If i was able to do special effects i would really dial the notches up on the jetback breaking, i would have it shooting bursts of flames or electricity left right & center.