You’re right about Ahsoka’s language being a little weird - I did take out some of her weirder language because she says a few things that are awkward or too bold in this episode - I did try to clean them up but couldn’t for whatever reason. but I’ll check again though.
I think it’s a matter of finding the balance. Part of the greatness of her character is how much she grows up from the pilot film to Rebels and removing too much of the childishness she exhibits makes that transition a bit jerky and less fluid, especially when it’s pointed out that’s she’s on the young side for a padawan anyway (in the pilot film).
I do find the ‘hairless’ line just plain silly, not because it’s immature, but because it’s just hypercritical and I only mentioned the second line because I can’t remember if it creates a continuity issue or not.
Edit: I’ve just seen your edited post. I think it’ll work out fine that way. I’m sure the Jedi are taught about Nightsisters to the point where a bald, Force wielding, woman, with tattoos can be assumed to be a witch to a Jedi anyway even if they’re not.