Thanks as always Sade.
Glad you spotted why I had to have the brief scene of Obi-Wan arriving on speeder where it is. There’s a little more tension if Viszla’s explaining shadowy forces when we don’t already know they’re active around the corner, so I needed something to split the two early scenes in his dining room (one standing, one seated). It’s a bit of a short shot but I don’t think it’s egregious, and it gives us more benefit than it takes away.
Glad you thought the cuts were clean (and liked the comedy background punching, which I thought was fun) - while I might not end up with this version, it’s good to know my skills are halfway decent.
I think I’ll try an alternate version of the no-conveyor scene as detailed above, where Obi-Wan doesn’t realise he’s drawing Satine into danger. I won’t have them randomly say “The boss will love his lightsaber” - we’ll infer that (since we already know the mine has multiple entrances), he forgot it in the chaos, and then Viszla picked it up and exited another way in time to face him.
The reason that I really want to remove the conveyor sequence if possible though is that it’s such a Bond villain idea. If you want to kill him, he’s unconscious, shoot him in the head (like Viszla does to one of his own guys later). It’s a plot driven by a silly decision, and I don’t want our first sight of Mandalorians in this show to be one that cheapens them.
Amazed that you spotted the elevator cut - that’s a very good eye. I’ve just had a play with that and actually it feels so much smoother without the SFX of the door opening that I’d put in. The SFX made it feel like one continuous scene chronologically, taking out that SFX allows it to simply be ‘shortly after’. Plus, you have fewer ‘events’ hitting your mind at the same time. One thing I’ve noticed from producing these first couple of edits is that I can strategise well and make decent cuts and transitions, but I don’t have a strong subjective feel for the results - my mind can do the ‘overall’ view and the ‘detail’ view, but is less good at the ‘natural flow’ view. All the more reason to iterate using feedback, and it makes those of you that’re actively giving notes all the more valuable, so thanks for your efforts.
The plan for Duchess of Mandalore is to play it (in its entirety I think?) a few episodes later. It feels like time passes by then, Satine’s a little settled on Coruscant.