What a great improvement over the original! Thanks for your hard work. Dunno if I have the clout here to make suggestions, but I thought I’d shoot for it anyways (given how minor it is).
What if you moved Leia’s body turning to a ghost earlier in the film as opposed to near Kylo’s death? It would keep the consistency of Jedi turning to ghosts immediately after death and wouldn’t conflict with her added “always” ghost dialogue during the Be With Me scene at the end.
Thematically it makes the most sense for her to disappear after Han disappears from Kylo, as that was the last of her life/energy she used: to send Kylo a memory of Han.