I rewrote your opening crawl to cut down the word count:
Following the conclusion of the Clone Wars, occupation of the planet MANDALORE transferred to the reorganized GALACTIC EMPIRE. As a result, civil war has broken out on the planet, making travel throughout the Outer Rim difficult.
Looking to secure a new hyperspace route, PHOENIX SQUADRON, a small Rebel cell led by Hera Syndulla, seeks safe passage to their fleet.
With SABINE WREN, a fellow Rebel turned Mandalorian, on their side, the squad sets Concord Dawn as their destination. . . .
I haven’t watched this arc of Rebels yet so let me know if there are any inaccuracies!
This is awesome! Too bad I just completed the supercut and download link is ready. But definitely in the future I will consider do another editing. Thanks for your input mate!