Here’s another test. I just dropped the whispers in, and I’d blend them in and adjust volume once we’re happy with placement. That extra shot helps a lot, actually. I can’t tell if the second whisper makes the cutaway to riders more abrupt, or if it is effective at implying the voices are guiding her into the DSII.
Looking good. Going off some of the other suggestions, what if while she’s looking out at the Death Star include cuts to the throne room, maybe throw in Vader’s breathing, the Emperor’s line from ROTJ “Fulfill your destiny,” and then re-use the shot of Rey looking down at the dagger. And then cut to the shot of the riders coming up, cut to Poe turning, Finn turning, and finally the shot of Jannah on horseback.