It was really fun overall! My thoughts will probably be very sporadic so bear with me. Also, my memory off all the plot points is a little foggy since I read it sporadically as you posted, so I definitely have forgotten things. Also, I definitely missed things too, like I totally missed that BB-8 “died” at first.
You definitely came up with ideas I never really considered, like Maz leading a gang of pirates, the medieval-style planet, Hux fencing with a lightsaber and actually being good, everyone using the Force at the end. I think that works as nice counter to Thrawn basically wanting to destroy it.
I will say one thing I wasn’t expecting was your depiction of the Knights of Ren. I imagined them as entirely different characters than the one’s we glimpsed in TFA. In TFA they seem dark, rugged, and dangerous. Whereas the Knights in Shattered Sword feel like the valiant Knights of the Round Table. I do think the hellscape idea would be interesting.
One thing I liked was that every character had a moment, even background characters like Connix or the Resistance Doctor.
I think one thing I would do differently if I were rewriting Episode IX, would be to have a lot of conflict and tension between Kylo and the Resistance crew from the beginning, and have that relationship grow until they’re friends by the final act. I feel like after Kylo makes Finn the commander of the army towards the beginning of the story, a lot of that potential conflict within the group goes away.
I also think the moment where Rey and Ben contemplate suicide in the dead ship is pretty dark for a Star Wars movie, but I guess we almost got Hux committing seppuku onscreen too. 🤷♂️
As far what I would like to see happen, you actually hit a lot of the beats I would like to see. I, like many people, like the idea of the final battle taking place on Coruscant. We also get redeemed Ben, Poe as a leader, Finn with other stormtroopers.
Of course there are some things I would do differently. I have certain scenes in my head that I would like to see play out. I definitely think figuring out the climax is a hard thing to do, and I think that is part of the struggle for me. How do create a satisfying antagonist when you make the most compelling villain a good guy in the first or second act?
I think you do a pretty good job of it in a unique way. I think I followed it pretty well for the most part. I typically get lost in action scenes, but I think I kept up with what was going on for the most part! I do think your second draft ideas are interesting, although I’m skeptical about Kylo being in carbon freeze and seeing how that would play out.
I do think Rey and Ben need to be close together whenever the climatic moment happens. I think it felt weird to me, that Ben was having this dramatic moment but Rey wasn’t really there with him, even though they are the two main characters. I don’t know if that makes sense.
A part of me is tempted to write out my own rewrite, but seeing how much you wrote, the prospect is slightly intimidating. 😂