My only sticking point is losing the emotional twitch from Kylo as the door closes. To me it feels like he’s reacting to something much more immediate (and tragic) than the radio broadcast, and now it feels out of place having it later. I know it’s a pain to find shots to use in the right order, but that definitely stood out to me.
That’s interesting. There’s a few shots that can be used in different ways. I always liked cutting from the door closing to the Kylo eyes closeup, and felt that the twitching shot (in this new context) felt like he was being disturbed/confused, unsure if he was hearing voices in the radio. He could be questioning his sanity. I also added some low level Sith whispers (good things come in threes!) to reinforce the idea that there’s more going on than the radio. I’m wondering if I should even make them a bit more prominent in the mix.