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Post #1313815

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The Rise Of Skywalker — Official Review and Opinions Thread — * SPOILERS *
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Date created
23-Dec-2019, 11:24 PM
Last modified
23-Dec-2019, 11:41 PM
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I wasn’t going to go. I didn’t want to know anything post TLJ.
But after hearing the rumblings so far I was a bit curious. Today I had some spare time and went to the local independent theater to rip the band aid off in hopes that maybe just maybe it was at least-at the very lest able to work on a serial adventure style level.

What I’m the world did I just sit through?
It’s not “slap in the face infuriating and insulting” like TLJ was but much more akin to the empty vehicle making you feel dead inside TFA-except that it is nonsensical to the extreme and decides to lift most of its plot structure from ROTJ and continually go off track whilst cramming in virtually any callback possible whether situational, visual or audible.

I lost count of how many times I audibly groaned, facepalmed, laughed to myself in anguished WTF ness and had my mouth fall open in pure “it doesn’t work that way!” astonishment.

The length is ridiculous for the incredibly small plot and if one were to remove every unimportant scene it would run about an hour tops.

As usual it feels even more of a waste because the actors are on the whole quite good but literally are archetypes who do what the committee direct them to do.

I could rant and rave but overall it really is a trainwreck that manages to feel like a bit of both previous Disney main releases AND simultaneously the worst “let’s wrap this up” aspects of ROTJ all the while being astonishingly uninspired.

Nothing is really answered. Nothing seems achieved. What was the point of these? They really had no game plan. That’s the most stunning thing.

Sure they’ve got problems, sure we love to riff on those issues, sure they needed naysayers and more time and more drafts but the prequels are so excruciatingly more on target that it hurts.
AOTC is Shakespearean in comparison to this release. Even ROTS, which I think is the worst of the prequels, is light years ahead.

Well…at least ROS is better than TLJ…but that’s not saying much…and it is nearly as bad but just empty instead of insulting.

I am very happy that it’s over and Disney has fallen on their rear end. They needed to after this so called trilogy attempt.
This will not work like the Marveldom releases they keep cranking out. They found out he hard way it won’t fit through their preconceived holes. Thus the focus is now on tv streaming releases and not features.