Kylo - This edit paints Kylo in a more conflicted light. As such his cutting down of an unarmed civilian and ordering the murder of the whole village makes him far too villainous, especially considering later events in the saga. Other than Tekka’s murder, Kylo doesn’t kill anyone onscreen until Han so it’s more plausible that he will turn.
In my opinion the opening works well as an introduction to Kylo, especially. I think he needs to be introduced as the main villain, even if the truth is more nuanced. His interaction with San Tekka hints that there is more to Kylo, with lines like “I know where you came from” and “The First Order Rose from the dark side, you did not”. And then Kylo kills him, which shows his unwillingness to face his past (“let the past die”, literally) and makes Kylo feel more like a threat. I agree that it could be a good idea to tone down Kylo’s evil side, but it still has to be there to some extent. You could remove his order to kill the villagers, though. Killing San Tekka was personal, but I doubt he cares about what happens to the villagers. RogueLeader had an idea about using a different line for Kylo there and have him say “I leave that to you” (later said to Hux) to Phasma. I did that in my WIP edit, so the dialogue goes like this:
Phasma: “Sir, the villagers”
Kylo: “I leave that to you”
Phasma: “No survivors!” (a line from Battlefront 2)