A couple of minor fixes:

It’s weird that Leia dies, but her body waits to disappear until Ben’s body does. Moving that shot to right after her death would be pretty simple.
They make a point of saying how nobody answered their distress call from Crait, but then the explanation for how they get the MASSIVE fleet at the end basically boils down to “Lando made a few calls.” Cut the earlier line, and then imply that the closing fleet is simply the payoff for all the recruitment the Resistance has been doing over the past several months (or however long it’s been since TLJ).