logo Sign In

How George would write the OT if he wrote them now

Author
Date
Author
Time
Post link
Imagine if the PT had been made first and George was sitting down now getting ready to write and direct episodes 4-6. This is how I could imagine him writing some of the Han and Leia confrontations in Empire.

Han
Well M’Lady, I guess this is it.

Leia
I guess so.

Han
Well, goodbye then.

Han leaves and Leia follows

Leia
Han?

Han
Yes M’Lady?

Leia
I thought you’d decided to stay

Han
Well, the Bounty Hunter we ran into on Ord Mandell changed our minds.

Leia
Han, please stay. We need you. I need you. You’re a great help to us, you’re a natural leader.

Han
And?

Leia
I need you. The thought of never seeing you again is hard to bear.

Han
How about a good bye kiss then?

Leia
I can’t. It wouldn’t be professional to kiss at work.

Han
Then I’ll see you later, M’Lady

Leia
Farewell Captain

Han
Farewell, M’Lady.

Later on......

Han
Well, it looks like you got your wish. I’m going to stay a little bit longer.

Leia
Well, General Reikan thinks its dangerous for any ships to leave the system until we’ve activated the energy shield.

Han
Yeah, I hope they do that soon.

Chewie starts to choke on a furball

Han
Cough the fuzzball up, Chewie.

Leia
Well, I’ll be seeing you later. Bye Han, bye Luke.

Luke
Goodbye Leia

Han
Goodbye M’Lady

Later on on the Falcon.....

Han
How’s this?

Leia
Would it help if I got you the hydrospanners?

Han
It might.
Leia
I hope this ship can get us past the blocade

Han
I’m guessing she will

Han
Punch it.

later on......

parked inside the asteroid field.....

C3PO
Sir, I don’t think the asteroid is entirely stable

Han
I agree. You and Chewie can go check it out

suddenly the ship tilts and Leia finds herself in Han’s arm

Leia
Thank you Han for bracing my fall

Han
You’re welcome, M’lady.

Leia
I’m going to go work on the Falcon now. See you in a few minutes.

Han
Okay.

a little bit later......
Han tries to help Leia fix the Falcon

Leia
Hi Han

Han
Hi, M’Lady

Leia
You can stop calling me M’Lady. We know each other pretty well.

Han
Sure, Leia. So do you think I’m cute?

Leia
Cute? You’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.

Han
Really?

Leia
Yes, my heart is breaking knowing that Jabba might keep us apart

Han
Don’t worry, he won’t get me.

Leia
Han? Remember how I said I like nice men?

Han
Yes. Do you think I’m nice

Leia
Yes!!!

they kiss. they do not get interrupted by 3po.
George Lucas was seduced by the dark side. The OOT ceased to exist in his mind and became the Special Editions...." "They're more maching now than movies. Twisted and evil."
Author
Time
Post link
AWESOME! Well done!

Quote
Han
Cough the fuzzball up, Chewie.


ROFLOL
Author
Time
Post link
Luke seats with Jabba to negotiate on Han Solo's life.

Luke: Now, mighty Jabba, the rebel alliance is ready to negociate in whatever means are necessary. Captain Solo is a good friend and a powerful leader, and I'm sure you don't apreciate the Empire messing up with your business.

Jabba: (no alien voice) I see that you are able to negociate a deal that might suit us both.

Luke: Indeed. Now, I am willing to offer you two ships and full suply, and a treated to a full access to the underground bantha selling guild in the planet Asino.

Jabba: Very well. I was unable to achieve a proper deal with the guild. If the rebel alliance is committed to intermediate a negociation between my clan and the bantha selling guild, I will return to you Han Solo.

Luke: Good. I'm glad we have achieved a proper negociation. Now, to the question of unfreezen Captain Solo.

Jabba: Let my technical robot explain to you the procedure.

Bot (voice by Richard Marquand): The procedure is quite simple. First, we shall get the carbonite and put it in a unfreezing chamber, fully modificated to allow a slow, controlled unfreezing. Then, we wil...

(Goes on for 45 minutes. They go back with Solo. Theres no Sarlaac pitt, Jabba survives).
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
Author
Time
Post link
Quote
Originally posted by: ricarleite
(voice by Richard Marquand)




"I don't mind if you don't like my manners. I don't like them myself. They're pretty bad. I grieve over them during the long winter evenings."
Author
Time
Post link
Leia: Stop that.
Han: Stop what, m’lady?
Leia: My hands are dirty
Han: My hands are dirty too. What are you afraid of?
Leia: I hate sand. It’s so rough and coarse and irritating.
Han: You can say that again, m’lady.
Leia: Okay. It’s so dreadfully rough and coarse and irritating. And it gets everywhere.
Han: Yeah, I wish everything around here was as soft and smooth as you are.

They stare at each other.

Leia: I’m trying to get something done. I feel that it would be wise of you to take advantage of my knowledge in this situation.
Han: Sorry, m’lady. You’re right. I don’t know why I keep arguing with you.
Leia: What I was going to say is that it’s too early in the script for us to kiss. I’m in my work clothes right now and you’re not supposed to kiss me until I put on something else. I haven’t changed clothes yet for this entire movie.
Han: Yes, but you don’t understand how I’m feeling right now. From the moment I met you, not a day has gone by when I haven’t thought about you. You are in my very soul, tormenting me. What can I do? I will do anything you ask.
Leia: Then bug off.

(etc. etc.)

Episode II: Shroud of the Dark Side

Emperor Jar-Jar
“Back when we made Star Wars, we just couldn’t make Palpatine as evil as we intended. Now, thanks to the miracles of technology, it is finally possible. Finally, I’ve created the movies that I originally imagined.” -George Lucas on the 2007 Extra Extra Special HD-DVD Edition

Author
Time
Post link
I shudder to think what the original trilogy would be like if it were being written now.
I'd like a qui-gon jinn please with an Obi-Wan to go.

Red heads ROCK. Blondes do not rock. Nuff said.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v72/greencapt/hansolovsindy.jpg
Author
Time
Post link
Quote
Originally posted by: Han Solo VS Indiana Jones
I shudder to think what the original trilogy would be like if it were being written now.


This comes to mind.
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
Author
Time
Post link
LOL, that scene with Han and Leia is hillarious. How about this one.....

Aboard the Death Star

Leia
Governor Tarkin, I had a feeling you were behind all of this. My colleagues had informed me in a boardroom meeting that this is the sort of thing you do.

Tarkin
Indeed it is. Princess Leia, before your execution, I would like you to watch as we show this battle station's full capabilities. After 20 years of hard labor, this battle station is about to be operational. No system will dare oppose the Emperor now.

Leia
Governor Tarkin, your threats will not scare the Rebellion. We will not be swayed by your bullying tactics.

Tarkin
We'll see what happens after we demonstrate the capabilities of this battle station. The Imperial officers and I have come to the conclusion that a peaceful system without strong enough weapons capabilities would make the most effective planet to destroy first. Since you are reluctant to tell us where your rebel base is, I have decided to destroy your home planet of Alderaan.

Leia
No, you can't do that!

Tarkin
Then tell me where the rebel base is!

Leia
Dantooine, they're on Dantooine, the fifth star of the Gantooine system in the outer rim.

Tarkin
You see Lord Vader, she can be reasonable, you may continue with the operation to destroy Alderaan.

Leia
What?

Tarkin
I can't believe an astute leader like yourself actually believed we wouldn't continue with this demonstration. But don't worry, we will deal with the rebel alliance in good time.

Leia
No!

Alderaan is destroyed. Meanwhile, aboard the Millenium Falcon, Obiwan Kenobi looks ill.

Luke
What's wrong?

Obiwan
Something terrible has just happened, I feel it in the force.

Luke
What do you think happened Ben?

Obiwan?
I'm not sure. The feeling I just had was very vague, but you must now get back to your excercises.

etc
George Lucas was seduced by the dark side. The OOT ceased to exist in his mind and became the Special Editions...." "They're more maching now than movies. Twisted and evil."
Author
Time
Post link
Luke: Obi-Wan, are you ok?

Obi-Wan: I am fine. I just... had a bad feeling... Like if thousands and thousands of midichlorians have been evaporated from the galaxy, leaving a void in the force. This could be a Sith move... I shall meditate on this issue.

Luke: I... I understand. I wish I was so wise as you are... or as the Jedi Knights once were.

Obi-wan: Don't mind those things. Everything on it's time. But please, don't unfocus from your training.

Luke keeps training with the ball. Obi-Wan reads some aurabesh from his handheld device.

Obi-Wan: (to himself) Quite amazing... quite amazing indeed... your midichlorian count is quite high. Indeed Luke does have the force of the Skywalkers with him. (loudly) As we arrive in Alderaan we shall have a meeting with Senator-King Bail Organa and discuss this situation as the R2 unit is inspected and the plans are taken from him. It has been a while since I have last spoken with Bail Organa, in fact, not since you were born. It shall bring great joy to my old heart to see that old friend again... even in such desperated hours.

(Goes on for another 50 minutes)
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
Author
Time
Post link
um, george is not a very good writer. He had Williard Huyck and Gloria Katz help him on the first screenplay, and lawrence kasden pretty much wrote all of empire and jedi. He comes up with the story concept technical details in the script like camera moves etc., but he is a terrible writer, but he is a great visual storyteller avante garde filmaker. Carrie Fisher was the script doctor on the Phantom Menace, and Jonathan Hales who wrote several scripts for young indy helped with attack of the clones. Lucas reportedly wrote revenge all by himself, and when you watch the film you can see the results of this. If you read the Matthew Stover Novelization you really wish other than getting into the chracters heads, it would've been great if they filmed that. Although much darker than the film, it would've gotten An R rating and not made as much money, but would have been a better film. Just like Terry Brooks Novelization is better than the phantom menace film, and also attack of the clones by r.a. salvatore was better than the film. Lucas even had help with the opening scrawl of the first star wars, spielberg, depalma, scorcese helped him rewrite it so it was coherant. Even Coppola helped lucas with some of the first drafts of star wars, just like he did for thx 1138 and american graffiti.

“Always loved Vader’s wordless self sacrifice. Another shitty, clueless, revision like Greedo and young Anakin’s ghost. What a fucking shame.” -Simon Pegg.

Author
Time
Post link
EXTERIOR: TATOOINE -- DESERT.

Jundland, or "No Man's Land", where the rugged desert mesas
meet the foreboding dune sea. The two helpless astro-droids
kick up clouds of sand as they leave the lifepod. The
lifepod in the distance rests half buried in the sand.

THREEPIO (in annoying Guido-stereotype used car salesman voice, voiced
by Robert Dinero): How
did I get into dis poodoo? I really don't know how. We
seem to be made to suffer. It's our lot in life.

ARTOO (in modulated Billy Barty voice): I hate sand.

THREEPIO: I've got to rest before I fall apart. My joints are almost
frozen.

ARTOO: I agree with you fellow counterpart-droid.

THREEPIO: What a desolate place dis is.

ARTOO: Come on this way, counterpart-droid.

THREEPIO: Where are you goin'?

ARTOO: Over to the rocky part of the terrain. Hop on this flying
repulsorlift disc so we can avoid the difficulty of the terrain.

THREEPIO: Well, I ain't goin' dat way. It's much too rocky. Dis way
is much easier.

ARTOO: That's where humanoids actually are, counterpart-droid.

THREEPIO: What makes you t'ink dere are settlements over dere?

ARTOO: Because I come fully equipped with radar sensors that are picking
up electro-tachyon impulses emitted from the midi-chlorians that
reside in the cells of all living creatures.

THREEPIO: Don't get technical wit' me.

ARTOO: Now hop on this repulorlift so that we can hover quickly. I
have been assigned a very important assignment from the princess who
was aboard the ship that we just launched from to deliver some critical
data to an old man who lives here.

THREEPIO: What mission? What choo talkin' 'bout? I had just
about enough of you! Go dat way! You'll be malfunctionin' wit'in a
day, you nearsighted scrap pile!

Threepio gives the little robot a kick and presses a button
that splits the repulsorlift disc into two parts. He hovers off
in the direction of the vast dune sea. Artoo hovers on his own
portion of the hover disc towards the rocky terrain.

THREEPIO: And don't let me catch you followin' me beggin' for help,
'cause you won't get it.

Duel Of The Fates plays as they go their separate ways.

THREEPIO: No more adventures. I ain't goin' dat way.

ARTOO: Hey wait, I've got rockets in my arms. Can't I just fly over this terrain?
I am fluent in over six million forms of procrastination.
Author
Time
Post link
That was hillarious. How about some more......

EXT - Landing dock - Endor

Vader
The Emperor has been expecting you.

Luke
I know, I have felt your presence ever since I boarded the stolen Imperial shuttle.

Vader
The midichlorians are strong in us both. You know, after me, you have the second highest count ever seen in a human being. Even higher than Master Yoda's. I took some of your blood from our
duel in cloud city and took some tests to see your Midichlorian count.

Luke
Very interesting father.

Vader
So, you have accepted the truth?

Luke
I have accepted the truth that you were once the brave and noble Jedi knight Anakin Skywalker.

Vader
Anakin Skywalker? Anakin. Now that's a name, I've not heard in a long time. Long time. I haven't gone by the name of Anakin since oh, before I broke your mother's heart and you were born as she was dying. It's my fault that she died. My heart aches just thinking of what could have been. I tried so hard to stop her from dying, but wound up causing her death by choking her. I wonder how they delivered you after I killed her. Maybe the midichlorian count inside her womb kept you alive. Anyway, that name, Anakin, no longer has any meaning for me.

Luke
It's the name of your true self, you've only forgotten.

Vader
Forgotten what? Did you not just hear what I said?

Luke
I know there is still good in you. The Emperor has not driven it from you fully.

Vader
From my point-of-view the Jedi are evil.

Luke
Come with me.

Vader
Obiwan once thought like you do. That is until we started our duel on Mustafar. You don't know the power of the dark side. I must obey my master.

Luke
I will not turn and you'll be forced to kill me.

Vader
Great, it must be my destiny to kill off my family.

Luke
You can't do this daddy. Please, come to the lightside.

Vader
No. The Emperor will show you the true nature of the force. HE is your master now.

Luke
Then my father is truly dead.
George Lucas was seduced by the dark side. The OOT ceased to exist in his mind and became the Special Editions...." "They're more maching now than movies. Twisted and evil."
Author
Time
Post link
Attack on the second Death Star:

CONTROLLER: Admiral, we have enemy ships armed with Buzz droids in sector 47.

On the screen can be seen the Endor moon, The Geonosian Death Star Mark II, and the massive Imperial fleet. Admiral Ackbar moves to the comlink.

ACKBAR: It’s a contrivance for catching and holding an unwary individual from which escape or relief is difficult! Alert the squadron to take evasive action in order to avoid becoming ensnared in this dastardly ‘trap’!

ADMIRAL BINKS: Weesa in deep poodoo!!

War does not make one great.

Author
Time
Post link
(Maybe I'll just revise the whole script and post it).

LUKE: I can't understand how we got by those troopers. I
thought we were dead.

BEN: The Force can have a strong influence on the weak-minded. You
will find it a powerful ally. Not to mention the fact that all of
the Stormtroopers are clones. They used to be pretty smart, but
they've gotten dumber in the past 20 years. They were once good
shots too, but not so much any more. I think it's because of the
fact the original source material for the clones was beheaded by a
great Jedi Master named Mace Windu 25 years ago in the first battle
of the Clone Wars. Your father and I were there. I thought I'd
mention him since he was a very important person in our galaxy's
history that you otherwise probably won't hear about.

LUKE: Do you really think we're going to find a pilot here that will
take us to the planet Alderaan, which the princess mentioned in her
holographic recording that Artoo played back for us in your hut?

BEN: Well, most of the best freighter pilots can be found here. Only
watch your step. This place can be a little rough. Stop. Think.
Take a deep breath. People go in here to hide, not to run.

LUKE: Yes master. I am ready for anything. I am trying.

THREEPIO (in annoying Guido-stereotype used car salesman voice, voiced
by Robert Dinero): 'Dis way, Artoo.

INTERIOR: TATOOINE -- MOS EISLEY -- CANTINA.

The young adventurer and his two mechanical servants follow
Ben Kenobi into the smoke-filled cantina. The murky, moldy den
is filled with a startling array of weird and exotic alien
creatures and monsters at the long metallic bar. At first the
sight is horrifying. One-eyed, thousand-eyed, slimy, furry,
scaly, tentacled, and clawed creatures huddle over drinks. Ben
moves to an empty spot at the bar near a group of repulsive
but human scum. A huge, rough-looking Bartender stops Luke and
the robots.

BARTENDER: We don't serve their kind here!

Luke still recovering from the shock of seeing so many
outlandish creatures, doesn't quite catch the bartender's
drift.

LUKE: What do you mean when you say that?

BARTENDER: Your droids. They will have to wait outside. We don't want
them here. Droids have not been trusted on the outer rim territories
since the invasion of the battle droids on the outer rim planet of Naboo
about 35 years ago. I thought I'd mention that since it is a very
important part of our galaxy's history that nobody seems to discuss
these days.

Luke looks at old Ben, who is busy talking to one of the
Galactic pirates. He notices several of the gruesome creatures
along the bar are giving him a very unfriendly glare.
Luke pats Threepio on the shoulder.

LUKE: Why do you not wait out by the speeder. We do not want any
trouble while we are in here looking for a pilot who will take us to
the Princess' planet of Alderaan.

THREEPIO: You got it, boss.

Threepio and his stubby partner go outside and most of the
creatures at the bar go back to their drinks.
Ben is standing next to Chewbacca, the Wookiee that Yoda
knew back in Episode III, who is now apparently a mercenary.
Ben speaks to the Wookiee, pointing to Luke several times
during his conversation and the huge creature suddenly lets
out a horrifying laugh. Luke is more than a little bit
disconcerted and pretends not to hear the conversation between
Ben and the giant Wookiee.
Luke is terrified but tries not to show it. He quietly sips
his drink, looking over the crowd for a more sympathetic ear
or whatever.
A large, multiple-eyed Creature gives Luke a rough shove.

CREATURE: Wanna buy some death sticks?!?

The hideous freak is obviously drunk. Luke tries to ignore
the creature and turns back on his drink. A short, grubby
Human and an even smaller rodent-like beast join the
belligerent monstrosity.

HUMAN: You wouldn't buy his death sticks. So he doesn't like you.

LUKE: I'm sorry.

HUMAN: I don't like you either

The big creature is getting agitated and yells out some
unintelligible gibberish at the now rather nervous, young
adventurer.

HUMAN: (continued) Do not insult us. You just watch yourself. We are
wanted men. I have the death sentence in twelve systems.

LUKE: I will be careful than.

HUMAN: You will be dead. I am now going to pull out my gun and shoot
you.

The rodent lets out a loud grunt and everything at the bar
moves away. Luke tries to remain cool but it isn't easy. His
three adversaries ready their weapons. Old Ben moves in behind
Luke.

BEN: This little one isn't worth the effort. Come let me buy you
something...

A powerful blow from the unpleasant creature sends the
young would-be Jedi sailing across the room, crashing through
tables and breaking a large jug filled with a foul-looking
liquid. With a blood curdling shriek, the monster draws a
wicked chrome laser pistol from his belt and levels it at old
Ben. The bartender panics.

BARTENDER: Please refrain from using blasters in my establishment!

With astounding agility old Ben's lightsaber sparks to
life and in a flash an arm lies on the floor. The rodent is
cut in two and the giant multiple-eyed creature lies doubled,
cut from chin to groin. Ben carefully and precisely turns off
his lightsaber and replaces it on his utility belt. Luke,
shaking and totally amazed at the old man's abilities, attempts
to stand. The entire fight has lasted only a matter of seconds.
The cantina goes back to normal, although Ben is given a
respectable amount of room at the bar. Luke, rubbing his
bruised head, approaches the old man with new awe. Ben points
the the Wookiee.

BEN: This is Chewbacca. He's first-mate on a ship that might suit our
needs.

CHEWBACCA: Rarrrghh Rarrrghhhaaahhh Rowrrr!

LUKE: Ben, can you please translate what he is saying? I thought all races
in the galaxy spoke to each other in Galactic Standard Auberesh.

BEN: Nothing of consequence. He just noted that he fought with a great Jedi
Master named Yoda in the final battle of the Clone Wars. Yoda is was the
head of the Jedi Council, which was a governing body that oversaw all
aspects of Jedi life in the Old Republic. I was on that council as well.
Yoda taught the man who taught the man who taught me. Those other men are
dead now, but I thought I'd mention them since they are a very
important part of our galaxy's history that nobody seems to discuss
these days. Yoda's still alive too. But I'm not going to tell you about
all of that now. With the training I've undergone for the past 20 years
since you were born, I know I'll have plenty of time to get into that later.

LUKE: Thank you for your wisdom and insight, Master Kenobi. I pledge myself
to your teachings. Now let us find this pilot who will take us to Alderaan.
Perhaps one day the princess and I will meet and I will find her to be as
beautiful in person as I have found her to be in the holographic message
Artoo played for us.

BEN: I accept your pledge to be a Jedi. So you know, a Jedi shall not know
fear, nor anger ... nor love.

LUKE: Then I must not c
I am fluent in over six million forms of procrastination.
Author
Time
Post link
"I am now going to pull out my gun and shoot you!" Hehe, that's awesome. I'd mention your last line too... but it's too easy. ^_^

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

Author
Time
Post link
This keeps getting better and better. Some more.....

Int - Executer

A helmetless/maskless Darth Vader is meditating in his chamber. All of a sudden, he begins to dream. Images of the former Anakin force choking Padme are the center of his nightmare. Suddenly Vader wakes up.

Vader
No!!!!!!! Padme!!!!!!!!!!

Admiral Piett who heard Vader's screams, comes into the room as Vader's helmet and mask are lowered onto his head.

Piett
What's wrong, my Lord?

Vader
I had the worst nightmare.

Piett
I know sir, this is the fifth Padme dream this week.

Vader
I miss her so much. My heart still aches for the woman of my dreams. She was so perfect. Did you know that the Emperor promised me?

Piett
Yes my Lord, I remember. He promised to help you save Padme from dying.

Vader
And I wound up killling her instead!

Piett
It's too bad the Emperor couldn't bring her back to life.

Vader
Ooh, maybe he can. Maybe I can find the powers that can bring my love back to the land of the living. Finally, I can save myself from my nightmares.

Piett
If you do bring her back, do you think Padme will even believe it's you? The last time she saw you, you were a young man with flowing hair and good looks. Now you look like Humpty Dumpty.

Vader
Humpty who?

Piett
Nevermind. Anyway, I almost forgot to tell you that the Millenium Falcon has entered an Asteroid Field.

Vader
An asteroid field? Oooh, let's go get them.

Piett
Are you sure we'll be safe?

Vader
Yes. It will be easy. Let's get em. Yippee!!!!
George Lucas was seduced by the dark side. The OOT ceased to exist in his mind and became the Special Editions...." "They're more maching now than movies. Twisted and evil."
Author
Time
Post link
Some more....

INT- Lars homestead

Luke
You know, I think those two droids might have been stolen?

Owen
And why do you think that?

Luke
Well, the protocol droid told me that the Astrodroid told him that he belongs to somebody called Obiwan Kenobi.

Owen gags on his drink and begins to cough hysterically. Beru slaps him on the back several times.

Luke
Are you okay?

Owen
I'm fine.

Luke
What about Obiwan?

Owen
What about him?

Luke
Is he Old Ben?

Owen
No. Obiwan died a long time ago.

Beru
Owen, that's not true. Obiwan is Old Ben. If it wasn't for him, we never would have adopted Luke.

Luke
Really?

Beru
Yes, after your father died, Obiwan brought you here. He's been watching over you for years. I have no clue what Owen has against Obiwan anyway. I think he blames him for your father's death, but he barely knew him, so I don't get the grudge.

Owen
I'm just afraid Obiwan's going to show up at our door anyday and demand Luke learn the ways of the force just like he did with his father.

Luke
Hey, I'm old enough to leave. If this Obiwan person ever needs me, I'm going to help him. Oh, and what the heck is the force.

Owen
I have no idea. Anyway, you can't leave at least for another year.

Luke
Yeah right. You're such an arrogant old farmer! You're holding me back! I want to join the Rebel Alliance and that's final!

Luke stomps off.

Beru
Way to go, dear.
George Lucas was seduced by the dark side. The OOT ceased to exist in his mind and became the Special Editions...." "They're more maching now than movies. Twisted and evil."
Author
Time
Post link
That dovetails beautifully into TROOPS.
I am fluent in over six million forms of procrastination.
Author
Time
Post link
INT Super Star Destroyer

Needa: Lord Vader, we have no signal of the Milenium Falcon. We seem to have lost it.

Vader: Idiot! You will pay for your incompetence with your life. I will use my force to kill you know, until you die a horrible death.

Needa: But I beg of you, Lord Vader, spare my life. We shall double, or let me dare say, triple our efforts to find the Milenium Falcon. It can't be too far. A ship that small cannot have a cloaking device. So it must be nearby, we just can't see it. Or maybe it crashed against our ship and we didn't even noticed. Perhaps they are dead by now, and if they are, I apoligize. Deeply. As I know you wanted them alive. But why? Why would you want them alive? They don't have any information we might need. Also, the second death star is being built, and according to the emperor, our plan to destroy the rebels cannot fail. And yet, you want those specific rebels, and the princess Leia. Do you have a trap in mind?

Vader: My plans concern me and the emperor only. I wasn't really going to kill you because of your lack of competence, or should I say INcompetence, but now that you've said too much in too little time I have no choice but letting this droid kill you.

Needa: No!

Droid: Okee-Okee! (shoots Needa)

Needa: (dying) I'm... so sorry... (dies, colapses)

Vader: Apologies accepted, captain Needa.

(Everyone around applaudes)
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
Author
Time
Post link
That Captain Needa scene is hillarious. Here's another one......

A new scene for A New Hope inserted right after R2 has been captured by the Jawas.

INT- Senate Meeting Room - Coruscant

Members of the Imperial Senate meet with Emperor Palpatine

Senator Oogabooga floats on his platform thingy to state his case. The Emperor is also at the center of the room.

Oogabooga
Emperor Palpatine, it is with great concern that we address you on this very occasion. It has occured to the members of the galactic Senate that our role in the galactic Empire has dwindled. We wish to have a greater say in intergalactic matters, trade routes, galactic business and affairs, as well as taxation in the third rim of the second planet of the Nantadoin system.

Palpatine
Senator Booga, while I have great respect for your views on these galactic issues, I have decided that the Imperial Senate will no longer exist.

Loud gasps are heard throughout the room

Nuke Gunray
Empuhrah Palpatine thees ees an outrage!!!

Many members of the senate begin to yell and scream

Palpatine
Order! Order! Silence. If you will not shut up, you will be destroyed!

He shoots Gunray will force lightning. Suddenly the room has fallen silent.

Palpatine
You have paid for your lack of vision! Your feeble political skills are no match for the dark side!

Gunray
I am so sorry my Lord. Please stop! You are the greatest man who ever lived.

The Emperor stops shooting bolts at the pathetic Senator.

Palpatine
Any further comments

Jar Jar Binks
Mesa hasa someting to say!

Palpatine
And what would that be my little floppy friend?

Jar Jar Binks
Well, mesa wanna knowsa, whesa me gonna go live? Now dat mesa unemployed, me have nosa way to suportsa meself.

Palpatine
Don't worry. Every former Senator will be generously compensated by the Empire for your service. Within two weeks, every one of you will be taken care of. Now then, the Imperial Senate is officially dissolved. You may all leave. Thank you all for your service. However, it is critical that I fully sieze control of the Empire in order for my fully armed Battle Station to become operational by the deadline. You are all dismissed.

George Lucas was seduced by the dark side. The OOT ceased to exist in his mind and became the Special Editions...." "They're more maching now than movies. Twisted and evil."
Author
Time
Post link
Eh? Gunray survived? Or is this his son?
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
Author
Time
Post link
Nuke Gunray is Nute's younger brother Nute was (thankfully) killed by Anakin/Vader in ep 3!!!
George Lucas was seduced by the dark side. The OOT ceased to exist in his mind and became the Special Editions...." "They're more maching now than movies. Twisted and evil."