Van Helsing - overall verdict.....................completely over the top nonsensical nonsense THAT WAS AWESOME NO BRAINER POPCORN MUNCHING FUN!
WE all knew it was going to be OTT after the Mummy Returns & the Scorpion King, I, personally, was expecting the whole thing to totally SUCK BALLS, but it was good crazy fun!
Troy......................................
Where the fuck did 200 million dollars go? It sure as hell didn't go on the script! Maybe it went into the CGI for Brad Pitts legs? Well this was a film I was looking forward too, being a BIG FAN of anything Greek Mythology wise, especially the classic Ray Harryhausen flicks!
I can forgive the subtle changes in the text, look to Clash of the Titans for complete arsing of Greek Legends, so what was the problem?
The film looks great, superbly shot & for the most part acted extremely, if not a little too hammy, well.
Eric Bana is superb as the troubled, yet noble Hector. Peter O'Toole lends an air of authority & tenderness to his role of Priam. Brian Cox totally hams it up as Agamemnon, Sean Bean is ever on form as Odysseus & Brendan Gleeson lumps it up as spurned King Menelaus.
Great cast & great photography.....so where exactly is the problem?
Orlando Bloom!
Sorry to any fans out there but he just can't act at all! How this kid has got so far is beyond me? If i have to sit through another film watching his 2 acting expressions (eyebrows up in a "arent i so cute way" & eyebrows down in a "cor im trying to look disgruntled but really look like i've shat my pants" kind of way) I shall scream!
His portrayal of Paris just left me wanting to boot the whinin little fairy right in the arse!
But perhaps i shouldnt be too heavy on him, its not as if he had a lot of quality written material to work with! Bordering on hammy, you can imagine the scriptwriter really thought he was getting close to achieving that classic golden Hollywood era of epic movie! Pffffff, Cleopatra this is not!
For all my ribbing I really did enjoy the movie, I was secretly hoping that it would be better than gladiator, which although a good movie, i found to be rather over hyped, alas it fairs no better than gladiator.
It's just such a shame that TROY had the potential to be so much & ended up delivering not enough!