Interesting thought process. It isn’t something I would initially think about, but I see where you’re coming from now that you illustrate it. You’re basically trying to find a good way to reorganize it where character motivations flow well.

So in this format, Kylo goes to the Falcon after the battle has already started rather than right before the Resistance arrives. I do think it would create tension like you said, since we would think Han and Co are on their way back there. Also, Kylo going back outside to look at the battle, and maybe see that the Resistance is failing to do any damage, he might predict that his father would try to do something to help, which he does in the very next scene.

I know he originally knows they’re there because they make some racket trying to get into the Oscillator, but this restructure could imply more that Kylo knows his father, and uses that knowledge to predict what he’s going to do. That, plus your other changes, would make Kylo seem much more active than before.