Those are some great ideas about using audio from extras, etc. I personally think if that device is employed though, best to keep it as a sign of Dany’s mental state. It wasn’t something employed stylistically in the show, and so I think it’s overuse could create dissonance. I liked your Long Night intro, but would constructively offer that it is a stylistic change from the overall tone of the series.
Your removal of Daenerys from Euron’s ambush was very well done, and it’s an interesting idea to move Rhaegal’s death to The Bells. I love that it isn’t Euron who gets him. (I seriously could not stand the show version of that character). Also nice to see Daenerys actually be able to do something with her anger afterwards. My main constructive point I’d offer here is that Dragonstone is still visible in the shot of the two dragons flying together. It might be possible to roto it out if you absolutely need that shot.
Looking forward to getting started with some of the ideas being discussed here.