So having rewatched both clips I can hear the announcement on the second clip - on first viewing (on my phone) I hadn’t noticed the announcement and had actually thought the audio glitched slightly, but being a test clip thought nothing of it. On my laptop I could hear it fine, but given that you had to point it out to me, I would say it was perhaps a little subtle - also perhaps if there could be a pause in Anakin’s line it could highlight that he has stopped to listen to it, and act as the viewer’s prompt that it is of some relevance so we should notice it too.

In your first clip the line about if Padme is “seeing anyone” bugged me - I don’t object to the idea behind it but the word seeing didn’t sit quite right. Perhaps something like “I heard she is no longer with her partner” could get the same meaning across without sounding quite as casual modern day speech? (This is all very much personal preference though).

Annoyingly I made a mock up of the Vader vision scene a long time ago, and also an incredibly rough version of the Obi Wan and Padme rescuing Anakin scene (where they all rode out of the arena on the Reek) but have lost them both some time back (always back up your work eh) so I cannot offer any visual help. I agree in terms of if you move the end to the start then how do you end the movie. The best I could think was to have a structure roughly like this:

Open with Obi Wan and Padme rescuing Anakin - use the scene with Padme seated speaking to Dooku. This plays out as per the film but tweaked to avoid reference to rescuing Obi Wan. Once the beasts are brought into the arena they all escape their chains and ride the Reek out of the arena, back to the ship and all fly home (no Windu, other jedi, or clones).
Increase Dooku’s screen time and have the assassination plot, leading to Obi Wan solving his mystery plot, but that leads him to Dooku’s other super secret hiding planet and there he has an even bigger droid army so best bring the clones in to fight them - this would be as per the film but without the arena beasts part, leading right through to the Dooku showdown (ideally without Yoda). Downside is without some hugely impressive editing Dooku’s choice in planets would appear very singular.
Between this beginning and ending, I would also choose to save the Anakin side trip to visit his mum after having the force vision I previously described. I’d also like to add the scene with Vader’s name, and more Dooku scenes, and reintegrate deleted scenes such as Obi Wan speaking about Count Dooku.

All in all though I fully accept that this would probably be very choppy and a lot of work to get there so probably wouldn’t be worth it. In the interest of throwing random ideas around though I still like it - I’m just not sure how to make it work as it is such a big change around.

Just some extra food for thought. Can we hear your idea for protecting the Vader reveal you hinted at yet lol?