Yeah, that’s what I was thinking. There are a few seconds of Poe “asleep”, then he sits up when Kylo Ren says, “I didn’t know we had the best pilot in the Resistance on board.”

I was thinking that you could put a shot of exhausted-Poe in between the shot of Hux and when Finn enters, with possibly a wipe between Hux and Poe to emphasize time having passed.

I am not sure about the reordering of the rest of the scenes, like moving Hux and Kylo bickering up, but I don’t see an issue with it either necessarily. I would like to see a workprint eventually just to see how it flows.

But actually I like your explanation of why you want to reorder it that way. It makes me think of the reason why the editors of Star Wars cut out Luke’s early scenes, since jumping to Luke felt too disjointed, and having Luke be introduced as the plot came to him felt more natural.

I think you should try it out and see how it feels. And I like the idea of having the wipe go with door opening up!

How would you transition from Finn putting his helmet back on to Poe’s interrogation?

I like the way you think about editing. There’s always this dilemma of editing according to logic/continuity and editing according to emotion/narrative. In this case I think it feels right, at least on paper, and also makes sense logically.

Also, had another little idea for you.
When Kylo Ren gets shot by Chewbacca, I thought an effective little addition would be to add some sound fx to the impact.
The Battlefront games have a lot of nice impact sounds when your character gets shot, and maybe adding that sound, making to where you really feel it in the bass, could help make understand how much it probably hurt Kylo.
Also, when Kylo kneels in pain, you could add a slight sizzling sound from plasma burn.

This is just an idea I had but I thought it might sound interesting to you too.