I have to say, I appreciate your different approach to this film. Most edits cut out Dex, and a few other things you decided to keep, so it is interesting to see you attempt to preserve them.

I donlike what you’ve done with it, but I think that scene could use a little more work.
First of all, I think you should end the scene on a shot of Kenobi rather than Dex like it does originally. It feels too abrupt as it is now.

Also, I know this will be difficult to deal with, but the continuity feels weird in this scene now because of the various trims. For example, seeing Obi-Wan walk into the diner and the next shot is of a closeup of him already sitting in a booth. Also, at one moment Dex has the dart in the palm of his hand, and in the next shot Obi-Wan has it. I don’t know if it would be possible for you to try to make issues such as these a little less noticeable.

Also, I get that some of the info seems a little unecessary, but I think keeping the line about him prospecting helps establish why Obi would go to Dex for this kind of info, since it implies that Dex is a well-traveled individual. Otherwise e have no idea why this raggedy-shirt guy would know anything about saber darts.

And while it is true that we never see Obi go to the analysis droids, that reference does explain why he had to go to a third party for this information. You could just keep that line and what Dex says about symbols, and remove the rest and go straight to Obi saying, “Kamino, I’m not familiar with it.” At the very least is another way the scene establishes Dex’s knowledge/experience.

While I do like how you cut out the beginning of the scene, the one thing we do lose is establishing that that restaurant is Dex’s Diner. Otherwise, he could just be meeting a contact at a random restaurant. Not sure how important that is.