Yeah, it’s not true that you won’t meet someone. It’s just hard not knowing who, when, or where that is so it feels a long way off. But in any case, it really is better that you got through this with her now rather than stringing yourself along forever.
I agree with most of what you say in the second half of this, but I object to the “It gets better” notion that people like to share all the time. Sometimes it does, and sometimes it doesn’t. I think it’s unhelpful to pretend that it’s a given that life is headed in an ultimately positive direction. That’s not even me being pessimistic, that’s just reality. Things don’t always turn out well in the end.
It depends. If you just sit alone and wallow in your misery, nothing’s going to get better. But there are certainly active ways that you can get out, get over with it, and move on. You just need to be willing to make that step. Not saying things will automatically get better, but if you don’t try, they definitely won’t.
Tell all that shit to David Foster Wallace, or Marilyn Monroe, or Robin Williams. Things might improve, but things can and still do get worse for people when they take coping steps so I don’t think people are doing anyone any favors by downplaying the reality that things getting better is not something you should expect because there’s a solid chance they won’t.
You guys like to pile on against mfm when he talks like that, but I find it very comforting.
I’m glad to hear that. I only bring it up because I can’t possibly be the only that finds the “It gets better” stuff far more depressing than any other piece of advice.
Right. That’s why I don’t like it when people say things will get better. They won’t. You have to make it better. You have to work towards it.
Even that isn’t a guarantee.