Hello Trident, it’s been a while hasn’t it?

Well, I’ve been suffering with depression for quite a few years now (seven I think), and been seeing a doctor for it, close to two years more or less. Time has become such an elusive concept for me…

I’ve recently turned 30 and have no dream, no purpose, nothing. I still have to figure out who the heck I am, with all that entails.

The only job I had managed to hold for a little while was almost a complete waste of my time because, as feared, no contract, and what little money I did get soon became too small a sum for me to have it worth my while. And I mean it, last offer was like 20 bucks a week in cellphone top ups only (!!), almost full time. I said so long pal.
It was good while it lasted. It did teach me a few things. But it wasn’t for long, as there was little to no money in it, and certainly no personal satisfaction.

I always think I’m letting my friends down. I am. I don’t deserve my friends.

Lately I have been staying up awfully late which has had the consequence of making it even more difficult for me to get out of bed in the morning, as if I didn’t feel like I wanted to die already.