Okay I’ll lay it out for you. I won’t do any other method because a failed attempt would be worse than dying, human weakness would cause me to fail I’m sure. With a gun I need only to get in place for a moment and pull the trigger. I can’t get a gun due to being hospitalized with suicidal thoughts a few years ago.
The only reason I’m alive currently is because I’m on a list. Am I saying I would kill myself right now if I could? Maybe. I don’t know. Probably. But would I have at some point between the start of this year and now? Definitely. But it’s not as easy to get a gun on the black market as many would have you think.
But the praise and admiration for “how brave” I am stops here and now.
This scares me. Possessed, please don’t kill yourself. Listen to what others have said, you’re worthwhile, your life is valuable. Please tell someone in real life you are thinking this way and ask for help.