Only Luke’s sister, Leia Organa
has the foresight to mobilize a
covert RESISTANCE. She has
sent her best pilot to find traces
of her lost brother, now her only
hope for a galaxy in peril…
I’m not a fan of saying “Luke’s sister” or “her brother” but oh well what do I know. I really like your crawl except for the final paragraph. I’d switch “a galaxy in peril” to “the galaxy” too, but that’s just me.