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Post #1155489

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Life Advice Thread
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Date created
7-Jan-2018, 6:38 PM

Speaking as an '80’s kid who had no contact with my dad, I can tell probably the most important thing to keep in mind is that his decision to not be a part of your life is not your fault and is no reflection on who you are or you value as a person. If I could go back and tell my 10 year old self one thing, it would be that it wasn’t my fault; I spent too many years blaming myself for something that I had no control over. My father chose not to be in my life, for what ever reason, but it wasn’t my fault and if for some reason if your dad makes that same unfortunate choice, that is also not your fault.

As far as what to do next, that is really up to you, but if you choose to contact him again, managing your expectations will be key to mitigating any disappointment you will feel if he does not respond. It will be hard, but if you really want to explore that relationship, then that would be the next logical step…a message/email telling him how you feel and, as you have shared here, how you do not wish to be a disruption to his life. And then brace yourself for the reaction/response as best as you can, even if it is no response at all. Can you verify/see if he has read the message that you sent originally, like with FB Messenger? I don’t know how the site works, but if he doesn’t frequent the site, is it possible he missed the message?