I stupidly mentioned I hadn’t ever seen a Trinian’s movie and found myself being treated to two in one (horrifying) evening.

“St. Trinians” (2007)

It’s a sad state of affairs when Russell Brand is the best thing about a movie.

0.5 out of 5.

“St. Trinians 2: The Legend of Fritton’s Gold” (2009)

I’m a nice person, I’m kind to strangers and animals, I don’t break the speed limit, I didn’t deserve to have this film inflicted on me. What the heck was everybody thinking when they made this?

Nothing out of 5. NOTHING, BLOODY NOTHING, DO YOU HEAR ME?