Had a series of strange dreams last night, but only recall this one.
I was on a sailing ship with Arnold Schwarzeneggar and Olivia d’Abo; he was dressed as Conan and she in her birthday suit. I wanted desperately to sleep with her, but Arnold told me the only way that would happen is if I disguised myself as him. Wanting to help me out, he gave me his helmet to wear, and then I tried my best Arnold impression; at first I couldn’t get a handle on it – I sounded like a Scotsman at first – but quickly managed to get it dead-on.
Olivia leapt off the deck and took a dive into the ocean. Not wanting to lose her, I dove in after her. After swimming in the murky water for a couple minutes, I located her. Taking hold of her leg, I swam back up to the surface and dragged her onto shore. We then had sex on the beach.
Oh, but then I had one of those dreams within a dream. I woke up to find my sexcapade with Olivia in the Land of Nod had left me … a bit messy. To clean myself up, I dived into a small pool and swam around for a bit. I think there were rocks at the bottom of the pool, like I was swimming around in a large-scale fish bowl or aquarium.
Luckily when I woke up for real, I was clean as a whistle.