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Post #104648

Author
MTHaslett
Parent topic
Episode II: Shroud of the Dark Side (the TM edit) (Released)
Link to post in topic
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/104648/action/topic#104648
Date created
8-May-2005, 7:37 PM
Then CUT as Anakin moves inside and Obi Wan continues: "Be mindful of your thoughts, Anakin, they betray you. You've made a commitment to the Jedi Order... a commitment not easily broken..."



Yes, so now, the dialogue is about Anakin's mother, not Padme.
/Quote

Exactly! As I look over the rest of the story, the rest will play better with just this much adjustment. I would go a lot farther in this direction though because there are so many "extra" beats of Anakin's lack-of-discipline. His every lecherous approach to Padme and smart remark to Obi Wan should be considered ripe for extraction. The best Anakin will be a straight forward Anakin who simply cracks under the pressure of his dreams and runs off to save his mom -- but is too late. Then (without telling Padme that he "killed women and children") he wins Padme's heart with his own sincerity. He allows her to pursuade him to help Obi Wan and they nearly die together and confess their love.