Serling1979

I was watching Six Days - Seven Nights the other night and I came across this line of dialogue by Ford:

"Well I'm the captain. That's my job. It's no good for me to go
waving my arms in the air and screaming "Oh shit, we're gonna die!" That doesn't invoke much confidence, does it?"

I would love to hear these lines when the MF is captured by the Death Star.

Also in that movie:

"I am the best god damned pilot you'll ever meet!"
"You talk too much. You're opinionated. You're stubborn, sarcastic,
and stuck up! Your ass is too narrow and your tits are too small."

I might have posted them before.

And another tidbit from Air Force One: "If this works, you get to be Postmaster General." Maybe to Luke before he blows up the Death Star or to Leia before she jumps head first down the chute.

doubleofive said:

Or have him accidentally fire the torpedo instead of opening his s-foils (with an Anakin "OOPS!"), then either show it randomly flying around until it enters the exhaust port, or have it blow up all the other rebel ships (each with an Anakin apology).

4 words: Pinball machine audio effects!

Ryan McAvoy said:

In the office when he quickly switches off the DS plans, how about he's actually watching the bit in Pulp Fiction where Jules and Vincent enter the apartment.

Almost like that's how he knows Sam Jackson has come meaning business.

Or Mace could catch him watching this Portman scene...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4N1fsImc6A

What would happen if Palpatine can't find the right button to switch the DS plans off? All sorts of funny and embarrassing stuff. He could just leave it on after several attempts to turn it off.

TV's Frink said:

Lol, the movie could cut out right before Vader decides to take Palps out in ROTJ.

Add the animated buffering ring from youtube. Palpatine has a bad connection. :D

I like the idea of Palpatine watching ROTS. It reminds me of Spaceballs. "What the hell am I looking at? When does this happen in the movie?" Great, now I have to watch that movie again.

Here's a thought: Deliverance banjo music on Dagobah. Right after Luke arrives on Dagobah.

I am not sure where this would fit:

James Earl Jones' performance in Comin to America is comedy gold. There was also a funny video on youtube where someone dubbed the quotes from Coming to America onto A New Hope.

Possible Vader Dialogue:

• Believe me. I tied my own shoes once. It is an overrated experience.
• Time does fly fast, my son. It seems only yesterday I ordered your first diaper changed. Now you're a man about to be married.
• I am looking for my son Luke.
• Admiral Piett, you have disgraced yourself, and you must be punished. Confine yourself to our royal suite at the Waldorf-Astoria.

In this scene:

Luke: Vader's on that ship.
Han Solo: Now don't get jittery, Luke. There are a lot of command ships. Keep your distance, though, Chewie, but don't *look* like you're trying to keeping your distance.
[Chewie barks a question]
Han Solo: *I* don't know. Fly casual.

Han's dialogue could be made funny with this addition (from Blade Runner):

Luke: Vader's on that ship.

Han Solo: Now don't get jittery, Luke. There are a lot of command ships. Keep your distance, though, Chewie. Move in.
[Pause with Chewie correcting the course]
Han Solo: Stop.
[Chewie barks a question, slightly confused look of the others]
Han Solo: Pull out, track right.
[Pause with Chewie correcting the course]
Han Solo: Stop.
[Chewie barks a question]
Han Solo: Center and pull back.
[Pause with Chewie correcting the course]
Han Solo: Stop.
[Chewie barks a question, mildly confused look of the others]
Han Solo: Pan right or-and pull back.
[Pause with Chewie correcting the course]
Han Solo: Stop.
[Chewie barks a question, really confused look of the others]
Han Solo: Pull back. Wait a minute. Go right.
[Pause with Chewie correcting the course]
Han Solo: Stop.

[Chewie barks a question, extremely confused look of the others]
Han Solo: Enhance 57 to 19. Track 45 left. Gimme a hard copy right there.[Old style printer spits out a piece of paper][Chewie barks a question]
........

I don't know where this scene is going. But it struck me as funny. :)

RicOlie_2 said:

And of course you should use the repetition gag for that--you could have him show up throughout the movie. You could make it so that Darth Vader doesn't kill Obi-Wan, Obi-Wan is still up on the tower pulling levers. So Obi-Wan would die when Luke blows up the Death Star.

LOL! This is the most painfully funny thing I have ever read. If this doesn't make it into the edit... :D

SilverWook said:

Good ol' Jack could also be sitting around on Hoth somewhere. ;)

 

 

Right after this scene: "Your Tauntaun will freeze before you reach the first marker!" :D That would be the most awesome crossover of movies!!!

Ryan McAvoy said:

It would be great if the whole Hoth sequence was rescored with Chrismas tunes as if that's why it's been snowing and not because it's an ice panet.

It could be piped in on the Hoth-Base intercom (Like you hear in shops) and heard over the cockpit radios in the battle.

LOL!

John Candy gave me a good laugh as well. :D I haven't seen Dumb and Dumber in ages (not really my thing) but this could work as well. Or we go good ol' Jack in Shining.

Lando really hitting Han could work as well. In combination with Chewie and Leia not really caring about it, this could be really funny. Han could feature a black eye after that. For the rest of this movie and R.O.T.R.-n.t.b.c.w.R.O.T.R. (Return of the Ridiculousness - not to be confused with Revenge of the Ridiculousness) since it wouldn't have time to heal.

Can you do that, Frink? :D

oh_riginal said:

A slightly different idea I had for the tauntaun:

http://vimeo.com/70818522

2 more options:

- replace John Candy with Nute Gunray (maybe even "now there are two of them" would work here)
or
- replace him with Jimmy Hoffa (did Ford ever say the name?)

darth_ender said:

Quotes from Batman for Lando are great, but I think quotes from Brian's Song might be even better.  There could be a whole lot of attention to the fact that he's the only black man in the OT, and considering the theme of Brian's Song, you'd have a lot of lines to pull from.

Here is a small sample from IMDB:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0068315/trivia?tab=qt&ref_=tt_trv_qu

Another example, when he sees Han, "How you doin' you old pirate!  So good to see you!  How's your mother?"

You're right. This would be really great. :)

Didn't Billy record an album? I think it was called Let's Misbehave. He could burst into song every once in a while just to be told to stop it.

Edit to add:
Just thought about this scene: Han and Lando meet (The "Why, you slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler."-scene) Have that really long awkward pause with crickets and all the thingmajigs, just to let Lando repeat the line. Maybe with some alternating reaction shots. Tension, tension everywhere!

I just watched Batman Returns last night. Billy Dee Williams speaks to the people of Gotham City: We've received a letter from Batman this morning. 'Please inform the citizens of Gotham that Gotham City has earned a rest from crime. But if the forces of evil should rise again, to cast a shadow on the heart of the city, call me.'

This might be changed to this:
We've received a letter from Vader this morning. 'Please inform the citizens of Bespin that Bespin has earned a rest from crime. But if the forces of evil should rise again, to cast a shadow on the heart of the city, call me.'

Maybe even with a Batman/Vader sign that shines in the background.

oh_riginal said:

Palpatine and Yoda could be dubbed with dialogue from the lightsaber duel between Saddam Hussein and Lloyd Bridges from Hot Shots Part Deux.

 

"Your powers are weak, old man, you should not have come."

"We'll settle this the old navy way: first guy to die, LOSES!"

Saddam may have lots of funny lines that could be used for Palpatine, though it's been a while since I've had a chance to see it.

 

Gag-ception! Great idea.

nightstalkerpoet said:

I'm pretty sure most of us wouldn't be able to identify that simply by the music. I'm not sure whether to give props to those who can, or...

Perhaps you could show Obi Wan seeing himself in the hologram doing something he's not proud of?

Love that idea.

It reminds me of Spaceballs. Obi Wan could see himself for a moment and just stare at himself staring at himself ... etc. "Prepare to fast forward!"

SilverWook said:

When Mace plummets to his doom...the famous "goofy holler" sound.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=103W5crCtP8

I like this idea. As an extension of this it might be possible to insert a shot of Mace landing on a flag pole that bends and catapults him up again. I can't remember. Is there dialogue between Anakin and Palpatine after that scene? Might be funny to have their dialogue interrupted by Mace going up and down again and again.

I had a few more ideas:

• Palpatine: Execute order 64 -- no, wait -- 65? 67? Just wipe them out. All of them.
• I am not sure how often George is seen in the opera scene. If it's more than once he could change colors every time.
• Mace: I am Mace Zeus Windu.
  Palpatine: Zeus?
  Mace: Yeah, Zeus! As in, father of Apollo? Mt. Olympus? Don't f*ck with me or I'll shove a lightning bolt up your ass! (from Die Hard with a Vengeance)
• On Mustafar Kenobi bursts into song (I didn't watch Moulin Rouge for nothing):
  My gift is my song... and this one's for you
  And you can tell everybody that this is your song
  It may be quite simple, but now that it's done
  I hope you don't mind, I hope you don't mind
  That I put down in words...
  How wonderful life is, now you're in the world
  (Then Anakin goes: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!)

SilverWook said:

Duke Dooku's severed head won't shut up and die, singing to itself in the background. When the ship changes attitude, his head rolls into the elevator shaft and falls past our heroes, still singing.

I love that idea.

Here are a couple of more that might be funny:

• Palpatine: I want you to be the eyes, ears, hands, feet, legs, toes, etc., and voice of the Republic. 
• Frustrate Palpatine by an endless amount of dialogue by Anakin when Palpatine explains about Darth Plagueis: The movie life as a house has: I don't know what that means. and I still don't know what it means. Palpatine could at one point just give up and walk away. and I'm not even listening.
• Yoda: Good relations with the Wookies, I have. (A quick cut to the Star Wars Christmas Special of the Wookie wife and kid)
• Kenobi: Did I miss something? (every time he walks into frame)
• Vader's speech sounds like a speek & spell with Palpatine or a droid saying that this will be fixed later
• Padme: Hold me, like you did by the lake on Naboo; so long ago when there was nothing but our love. No politics, no plotting, no war. (leave it. this is comedy-gold!)
• After delivering Luke and Leia, Padme goes on and on about that there is still good in Annie (everyone gets bored and they turn off the lights with her still going on)

Maybe some of this is helpful. :)

TK-949 said:

It's some round thing the model maker thought would look cool there. That's it.

Look at all the glass shards! You broke the fourth wall. Nevertheless, I now consider that to be canon.

It would also be possible to make screenshots of the blu-ray or the dvd (maybe that might be too small) version and to run it through an ocr software.

pittrek said:

Yep, me too, I replied immediately and never got any response

Me too.

Cobra Kai said:

Please, please just don't make me have to endure another Hayden Christiansen force ghost in EP VII. 

That's the main character. Don't you know about Walt's vision... I mean George's vision?

1990osu said:

He came back;) Or wait, maybe it is his evil twin clone or something that must be destroyed.  Yes!  During the Clone Wars, Palpatine cloned HIMSELF. 

The Empire is NOT dead. 

 

That's where I see this going...

I am pretty much afraid that you might be right. Maybe something good comes of this.

You_Too said:

Star Wars Episode VII - The Curse Of The Black Hole

Johnny Depp - Captain Jack Mynock

Sylvester Stallone - John Ronto

Arnold Schwarzenegger - Ronan the Toydarian

George Lucas - Jabba the hutt

And Creepy Puppet Yoda as himself

Now that I would be happy to pay money for.

buddy-x-wing said:

but after hearing George 's announcement, I wouldn't be surprised if a Boba Fett spin-off movie is being thrown around as an idea, I really hope they don't, but I wouldn't put it past them.

I think apart from the direct sequels (I might just live long enough to see Episode 25.) this is exactly what we'll see. They turn every inch of that franchise into money. Maybe they produce some good things along the way, who knows.

1990osu said:

Starring: Ian McDiarmid

Wasn't he killed in ROTJ?