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The Force Awakens - Ridley's Edit (WIP) — Page 2

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Ah ok then, so I agree with that option quite a lot ! I thought you were going to do the same as DigMod’s edit, that in my opinion wasn’t very convinving on this matter. So you’ll just remove Snoke’s “in the hands of your father” and Ren “Grand-father” ?

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MalàStrana said:

Ah ok then, so I agree with that option quite a lot ! I thought you were going to do the same as DigMod’s edit, that in my opinion wasn’t very convinving on this matter. So you’ll just remove Snoke’s “in the hands of your father” and Ren “Grand-father” ?

Yes! And possibly Han’s line “I saw our son”, but I’m unsure about that one. That might be a good moment to introduce the idea of there being a son, before we find out who it is. Maybe I’ll just remove the “he was here” part.

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i’ve just read your updated cutlist: seems good ! I wish you would cut more (slight comedic) things but I globaly agree with the list. At two exceptions: the trimmed Max Von Sydow confrontation with Ren, which I find already short, but I would need to see it done so I may agree with the idea; the main thing I think I don’t agree with being the ending. But again I may change my mind about that when I get to see the finished result. The issue being I like fanedited version to keep the last shot of the official theatrical cut as it is (or more or less s it is, since Hal/Nev version has stabilized the shot).

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 (Edited)

The issue of the reveal of Ren’s parentage is the only other one on your list I’m not personally sure of. It’s mentioned a lot around here but I don’t particularly see the value in delaying the reveal to a more dramatic moment (such as with Han and Ren on the gantry in the most extreme case). Is the intention to make it a bit of a one-two punch?

For me (and maybe only me) it worked fine as is. Learning he was Solo’s son early gave me more time in the cinema to mull over the tragedy of it all, as the plot drove towards their confrontation. Knowing he was a ‘failed’ Skywalker made him more compelling and tragic throughout the movie.

(I suppose, as an aside, one thing that the sequel trilogy does well IMO is paint Kylo as one of the main characters on a par with Rey, in contrast to Vader who was, in the originals, much more of a foil to Luke rather than originally a tragic character in himself - Vader’s revelation was Luke’s tragedy, whereas Ren’s is Ren’s. Similarly Vader’s revelation is a vital beat in Luke’s story, but Ren’s isn’t in Han’s, as Han already knows.)

Perhaps my argument here is that aiming to hide the revelation only serves to suprise the audience, but it doesn’t suprise any of the main characters, so it doesn’t add to their emotional arcs. And as revealing it to the audience later doesn’t carry additional emotional heft for our main heroes (because it’s not a suprise), we’re not taken on a different emotional journey by hearing it either here or there. And as I said earlier, when you do leave it as is you get the persistent discomfort and anticipation about their eventual confrontation.

The Clone Wars: Refocused | Andor: Movie Omnibus

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MalàStrana said:

i’ve just read your updated cutlist: seems good ! I wish you would cut more (slight comedic) things but I globaly agree with the list.

Any particular things you would like to see cut?

MalàStrana said:

the main thing I think I don’t agree with being the ending. But again I may change my mind about that when I get to see the finished result. The issue being I like fanedited version to keep the last shot of the official theatrical cut as it is (or more or less s it is, since Hal/Nev version has stabilized the shot).

There could be an issue with cutting out the ending when you watch different edits or original versions back to back and they don’t quite line up. My thinking behind removing the bit with Luke is that the scene is unnecessary in hindsight. Back in 2015 it was nice to get a look at Luke, but having seen TLJ the “cliffhanger” ending doesn’t quite work for me. Knowing that Luke will just throw the lightsaber away takes away the suspense of the ending. And ending with the Falcon in space seems like a more traditional Star Wars ending.

I’m still not totally sure about this decision though, since I like that the Luke ending gives some closure to “Luke Skywalker has vanished!”. Perhaps I could make two versions.

EddieDean said:

Perhaps my argument here is that aiming to hide the revelation only serves to suprise the audience, but it doesn’t suprise any of the main characters, so it doesn’t add to their emotional arcs. And as revealing it to the audience later doesn’t carry additional emotional heft for our main heroes (because it’s not a suprise), we’re not taken on a different emotional journey by hearing it either here or there. And as I said earlier, when you do leave it as is you get the persistent discomfort and anticipation about their eventual confrontation.

Good points. I still feel like it’s nicer to not spell everything out immediately, and I find it a bit silly how Snoke refers to Han Solo as “your father” and how Kylo addresses Vader as “grandfather”. So while I agree with you that the change may be pointless, it just feels slightly better to me this way.

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Sir Ridley said:

MalàStrana said:

i’ve just read your updated cutlist: seems good ! I wish you would cut more (slight comedic) things but I globaly agree with the list.

Any particular things you would like to see cut?

I checked my “perfect cutlist” on page 1 of your thread, and while I don’t agree with myself on a few things that I don’t mind anymore, I still think the following changes could improve TFA:

  • Cut Poe and Finn’s conversation after Finn says “Because it’s the right thing to do” [DigMod Edit]
  • Cut Finn’s “this is what we look like, some of us” lines [DigMod Edit]
  • Cut Finn and Rey’s excessive teenage celebration after they make it to space [DigMod Edit]
  • Cut the “14 parsecs” dialogues
  • Cut the cameo of the sphere Luke used in Episode IV
  • Cut Poe’s bull’s eye shots to free Han-Chewie-Finn [DigMod Edit] (not sure I doable seamlessly)
  • Cut Poe’s references to his jacket when talking to Finn [DigMod Edit, but keep the “you completed my mission” part of the dialogue]
  • Remove troopers walking away from Ren’s wrath after he discovers Rey is missing [DigMod Edit]
  • Trim Leia’s lines about good old times with Han “there was good moments” “pretty good”
  • Cut the “I’m in charge now !” part when Han and Finn encounter Phasma
  • Cut Finn’s Episode IV reference “Trash compactor”
  • Cut Snoke’s lines about Ren who needs to finish his training
  • Trim down the “puzzle map” scene so it get faster (it’s so obvious I don’t get why Poe needs to wait on BB8 request to give him/her the usb key)

(side note: Poe and Rey are in the very same shot ! Are you going to remove their “first” encounter in your TLJ edit ? 😃)

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(Respectful) thoughts on MalàStrana’s suggested list, for balance (no offense Malà, this is my opinion only ❤️)

  • Cut Poe and Finn’s conversation after Finn says “Because it’s the right thing to do” [DigMod Edit]

I liked this. You need a pilot/I need a pilot is funny and telling. We know Finn’s a moral guy (he’s just defected), so I don’t think this cheapens him, but it shows (like later with Han) that he’s not quite sure how to position himself yet so he often shoots for heroic. I think that’s quite telling too - that’s what he thinks non-FO people value. It’s who he wants to be seen as, whether or not he is yet.

  • Cut Finn’s “this is what we look like, some of us” lines [DigMod Edit]

Agree. A little wobbly.

  • Cut Finn and Rey’s excessive teenage celebration after they make it to space [DigMod Edit]

No, this is delightful! They’re young, they’ve just done something really great together, they’re excited, they’re clumsy!

  • Cut the “14 parsecs” dialogues

I like this, personally. Han is a legend, and with the Solo movie coming out soon too it’ll be nice to have the continuity. I don’t think this is an egregious easter egg.

  • Cut the cameo of the sphere Luke used in Episode IV

This, however, I totally agree on. A bit too cheap/convenient, takes you out of it.

  • Cut Poe’s bull’s eye shots to free Han-Chewie-Finn [DigMod Edit] (not sure I doable seamlessly)

Not sure what you mean by this. I don’t think I noticed any egregiously perfect shooting.

  • Cut Poe’s references to his jacket when talking to Finn [DigMod Edit, but keep the “you completed my mission” part of the dialogue]

Like with Finn and Rey, I disagree. It’s a really cute moment which quickly establishes a relationship. Finn’s a good enough guy to offer it back; Poe’s a good enough guy to want to encourage Finn.

  • Remove troopers walking away from Ren’s wrath after he discovers Rey is missing [DigMod Edit]

I thought this served a double purpose: First, it was one of the most genuinely funny moments in the film (without being a forced joke), and second, it shows that this is actually the kind of thing Ren’s prone to. It works, for me at least, that he’s brash and emotional like Anakin, and unstable too.

  • Trim Leia’s lines about good old times with Han “there was good moments” “pretty good”

Not sure on this. I really like that Han and Leia had ups and downs (more downs) - it made their relationship feel tangible.

  • Cut the “I’m in charge now !” part when Han and Finn encounter Phasma

Yep. Agree. Clumsy.

  • Cut Finn’s Episode IV reference “Trash compactor”

Far too cheeky a reference. They wouldn’t be joking then.

  • Cut Snoke’s lines about Ren who needs to finish his training

Indifferent here. On the one hand, we don’t see Ren finish his training in TLJ. On the other hand, Rian Johnson’s confirmed that it was intended that killing Rey was finishing his training. On the third hand (?) that’s not explicit at all, so you could just as easily get away with “Bring Ren to me”.

  • Trim down the “puzzle map” scene so it get faster (it’s so obvious I don’t get why Poe needs to wait on BB8 request to give him/her the usb key)

Yeah, fair enough.

The Clone Wars: Refocused | Andor: Movie Omnibus

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Eddie took all my responses to Mala’s suggestions out of my mouth.

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Expected, I’m usually harsher with TFA than most people on this forum 😃 No offense taken EddieDean 😉

(but we still agree on a few things, that’s something 😄)

My points of most of the changelist are the followings:

  • cut down the fact that a good character, Finn, turns into some kind of comic relief cliché after the first act (something TLJ corrected by the way after an equally bad “black sidekick from the 80’s” opening scene when he wakes up)

  • try to bend Ren into a more menacing vilain, not the one that is ruined with jokes here and there.

And since you mention the “Han is a legend” thing, I believe this is a very wrong meta layer in TFA. It bothers me the most as a matter of fact. It’s not “Han, the war hero” it’s literally “Han, the cool character from the original trilogy, 'member him ?”. I really hate it. I would totally be in favor of removing all the OT references for that very reason. Besides, I don’t get how a former stormtrooper - Finn - would refer Han as a “War hero”. So, I would really love this entire meta dialogues to be removed (but, again, I know I’m alone about this 😃):

  • Han Solo, the Rebellion general?
  • No, the smuggler.
  • Wasn’t he a war hero?
  • This is the ship that made the Kessel Run in 14 parsecs?
  • 12!

(really terrible lines IMHO)

And my issue with the Leia/Han lines is the lines themselves but also the way they are delivered (I don’t buy for a single second their relationship with this scene, it’s phony and probably the worst Leia/Han moment of the entire saga).

But about the jacket scene and the teenage celebration… I don’t hate it, I just feel it’s forced. The jacket scene can be cute in a way,I can agree about that, but the celebration really is excessive and is not even consistent with the next scene between Rey and Finn, so… yeah… maybe not removing it, but at least trying to tone it down so they more quickly pay attention to BB8 (besides I really like the way DigMod cut this scene, it felt less than a forced callback to ANH… something TFA has too much me-think).

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I’m leaning toward Eddie’s view of things, but I will consider these edits, thank you! 😃

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Few, that was a lot of stuff to read. OK, I only ready most of the comments so if I’m treading old ground, sorry.
I was really impressed with you cutting/editing list, I think you have excellent taste. But it is Star Wars so obviously I have an opinion and yes, I’ll keep it brief(ish).
I don’t really know what replacing the main theme will entail, so well I’d need to see/hear it to form an opinion. I’m also unsure about a few of the minor changes involving FX work, often good edits fall short here but I have faith that you won’t Lucas it and go ahead even if obviously not working.
I do like the idea of using some shots form the teasers, some where very iconic and I was sand to see them go (no chance for Kylo’s saber ignition I suppose?).
As far as some of the discussed topics I’ll start with saying cut Luke form the ending. It threw of the pacing and I clearly remember myself and half the audience starting to stand as and cheer just as Rey left the planet, only to slump back confused and wandering if we were in for another half hour.
As for the Kylo reveal, I’d say don’t remove the Snoke scene, we get little enough of him as it is. I’d move it or just cut part of the dialogue. Maybe if it when after Kylo had discovered Solo on Star Killer? IDK. More importantly cut whatever mension Han/Leia make to having a son, until the point that you with to make the reveal (Which I guess is when they are talking just before Han goes to Star Killer?) and keep the “grandfather” line, that way the audience might at first assume Luke to be Kylo father; maybe?
That island scene magnifique! But if I were to critique it, I would say try to make the dunes and the island line up. Otherwise leave it looks sooo pretty.
Don’t remove Ren’s wrath, the fact that he is an “imputation child” is just part of his character and gives him somewhere to grow from (become less childish).
OK I think that it for the discussed items. Now my ideas…
Now I could’t tell from you list but just in-case you weren’t planning on it, could you do something about how Finn gets his name? The way it happens is soooo forced: “F, N uh? I’m gonna call you Finn!”(?!)
Finn’s “that one heck of a pilot” line, it s just weird.
Is it possible to vary up some of the X-wings, with some different colours, it just seems odd how everyone has a uniform blue/white X-wing and then Poe is the only one with a half way unique version. Also if his is the only unique one then why was he not using his own when he went to Jakku?
I can’t think of anything else so I’ll leave you with one question: If your using TFA:Restructured, does that mean that all the changes form that will stay? Its just they all worked, and where executed flawlessly. I’m mostly referring to the addition of the deleted scene with the woman we see on Hosnian prime. See her be sent by Leia to warn the republic only to be caught by the Hyperspace beam really made that whole thing feel just that little bit more tragic.

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Thank you for commenting! I’ll try to answer everything.

• I’ve had second thoughts about replacing the main theme. I don’t feel strongly about it so it might as well be left as it is.

• I’ll try to not Lucas it up, yes. 😉 It’s mostly the desert bird where I add unnecessary digital effects, but I think it will look nice.

• I do love the shot of Kylo’s saber ignition. If I can fit it in it could be a nice addition.

• I do plan on cutting Rey’s arrival on Ahch-To and saving it for my TLJ edit. Originally I thought it should stay, but after seeing TLJ I felt the cliffhanger was unnecessary.

• I’m not removing any Snoke scene, just some dialogue. The Ben Solo reveal will be gradual but I will keep Han/Leia talking about him before Kylo removes his helmet for Rey, so at that point it will be clear who he is.

• Thank you, I might fine tune the island vision a bit, we’ll see.

• I don’t plan on removing Ren’s wrath.

• I don’t mind how Finn gets his name, I don’t see how it could be handled differently. I feel like that’s when he and Poe becomes friends, so it has a use. I don’t mind “that one heck of a pilot” either.

• I see your point about the X-wings, but I haven’t really thought about it and I think it would be too much work to change it, sorry.

• All changes from Restructured will stay, yes! 😃

Thank you for your interest. I still have a lot of work left, but there could be clips and perhaps a workprint cut coming up in the next months.

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I am digging this so far Ridley!

Now back to work! 😉

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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Sir Ridley said:

The resistance gets alerted first which makes the spy reveal less surprising. But it’s no big deal, its probably better to just leave it in. I’ll consider changing the subtitles though, that’s a good idea!

Um, could you restructure the scene so that we see the FO spy send a message, then after the FO arrive and we go to the R droid and it starts to notify the Resistance, but gets cut off be an explosion (the ties bombing the castle). So it can go from Maz saying “there here” to the droid (you can change the sub to whatever and dub chatter for screaming) before an explosion effect fills the screen and to Rey arriving and then looking in horror as we cut to the outside being destroyed and collapsing. Or something.

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Telion said:

Sir Ridley said:

The resistance gets alerted first which makes the spy reveal less surprising. But it’s no big deal, its probably better to just leave it in. I’ll consider changing the subtitles though, that’s a good idea!

Um, could you restructure the scene so that we see the FO spy send a message, then after the FO arrive and we go to the R droid and it starts to notify the Resistance, but gets cut off be an explosion (the ties bombing the castle). So it can go from Maz saying “there here” to the droid (you can change the sub to whatever and dub chatter for screaming) before an explosion effect fills the screen and to Rey arriving and then looking in horror as we cut to the outside being destroyed and collapsing. Or something.

That’s interesting, that would let the FO spy be the reveal that they’re found but still show how the Resistance found out as well. But I’m not sure if cutting to an unknown droid as the attack starts is a good idea, it might be better to focus on the main characters at that point. And that would give the Resistance very little time to react, as well. So I think it’s better to cut it or leave it rather than move it.

One solution could be to just leave the robot shot but remove the subtitles so we don’t know what it says, but that wouldn’t be very different from just cutting the shot I guess.

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Fair, I hadn’t thought about the timing. But actually I have an idea. What about only having one spy, say something like “They’re here” or “It’s here” but its ambiguous who is being notified. Still have tension but we can assume that the resistance is the one being told, and that the first or found out. Or vice verse and Maz told Poe because apparently they’re best buds (stupid TLJ).

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Telion said:

Fair, I hadn’t thought about the timing. But actually I have an idea. What about only having one spy, say something like “They’re here” or “It’s here” but its ambiguous who is being notified. Still have tension but we can assume that the resistance is the one being told, and that the first or found out. Or vice verse and Maz told Poe because apparently they’re best buds (stupid TLJ).

That’s could work well. Han even says when they get to the castle that the First Order ‘isn’t far behind’, so presumably Kylo wouldn’t even need an informant at the castle to know. That would mean that there need only be a Resistance informant in the castle, and I’d choose the lady since she is more integrated into the scene and her somewhat sinister look would sell the ambiguity of her intentions.

I also really like that Maz’s castle hasn’t been infiltrated by the First Order because that makes Han a little less stupid for bringing BB-8 along even when he knows the droid is wanted.

You probably don’t recognize me because of the red arm.
Episode 9 Rewrite, The Starlight Project (Released!) and ANH Technicolor Project (Released!)

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That could be a good compromise, it’s mostly like my original idea of just cutting the droid, but more open for interpretation. Nice.

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Not sure, but probably not earlier than August and possibly later than that. Thanks for asking.

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Ok thanks for responding so quickly. I’m really looking forward to your edit, from the bits I’ve seen and what’s to come I think it will be the definitive way to watch force awakens.

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Ptaaffe2000 said:

I think it will be the definitive way to watch force awakens.

I feel the same: Restructured + a few things removed, it might do the trick to brigde the quality gap when we go from Episode 6 to Episode 8.
Take your time 😉

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I’m also very much looking forward to it. Out of all the changes listed, the only thing I’d suggest doing differently is to let the “reveal” of Kylo Ren’s parentage occurs when Han meets Leia and says, “Leia, I saw our son.”
It keeps the drama present in the original just in time for it to come into play, holding out mystery up to that point, and makes for a cooler moment of revelation.

Could you post a clip or description of your first Snoke scene? It might be super short if you are removing both the Starkiller planning AND the Solo reveal.

My stance on revising fan edits.

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Me too! Looks like a great version shaping up here.

I’d also like to say I agree with EddieDean’s suggestions.