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The Beginning: Making 'Episode I': A comedy masterpiece — Page 2

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Trust me, I've had to go through each scene and analyze every shot of this. Attack of the Clones is an awful, awful film in every category. Music is mediocre, cinematography is awful, script is awful ("I wish I could just wish away my feelings"), acting is horrid, and the whole mess is packaged in incredibly unrealistic CG. The film deserves the flak- it's just complete, contrived crap.

Episode II: Shroud of the Dark Side

Emperor Jar-Jar
“Back when we made Star Wars, we just couldn’t make Palpatine as evil as we intended. Now, thanks to the miracles of technology, it is finally possible. Finally, I’ve created the movies that I originally imagined.” -George Lucas on the 2007 Extra Extra Special HD-DVD Edition

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What in the world was the point in the constant "m'lady" lines?
and
Who's idea was it for Anakin to "protect" Padme - wesa morons.

Does anyone ever fall to sleep when watching AOTC?

What could have been amazing and well worth the wait was a pathetic excuse of three films and hundreds of millions of dollars.
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Originally posted by: vote_for_palpatine
Yeah, I'm going to end this exchange in this post. Bear in mind that I was not the one who began the putdown fest, so don't go playing the poor tortured victim here. I don't get preemptively snarky with anyone,...


Uh, dude, if you didn't start this putdown fest, then who did? Your memory isn't that great either, fortunately on message boards all things are recorded, check out your preemptive snarkiness posted on Sunday, November 11, 2007 at 1:01 AM.


... and in fact my first post on this topic had nothing to do with you. To be fair, maybe that's what you thought because my first post came right after a post of yours.


To be fair, maybe I thought that not only because your first post in this exchange came right after my own, but consisted entirely of a quote by quote from my post, which included some slightly "snarky" comments about some of the things I had said, to which I responded "snarkily" only to your "snarky" bits and left the rest respectful. I may have been a bit harsh on your "Yoda/Chinese speak", but you yourself were using it as a way of putdown.

Anyway, my mistake was responding to an exessive quote-and-address-every-sentence response, which usually evolves into pointless time consuming arguments, where each user is on the look out for the slightest typo or gramatical mistake so they can prove how ignorant the other person is. Pretty rediculous. I should not have sunken to that level. Only reason I kept going was because I felt a bit attacked, but I should have let it slide.

And all I have learned from this exchange is that you would make a damn good politician.

"Every time Warb sighs, an angel falls into a vat of mapel syrup." - Gaffer Tape

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Originally posted by: Trooperman
Trust me, I've had to go through each scene and analyze every shot of this. Attack of the Clones is an awful, awful film in every category. Music is mediocre, cinematography is awful, script is awful ("I wish I could just wish away my feelings"), acting is horrid, and the whole mess is packaged in incredibly unrealistic CG. The film deserves the flak- it's just complete, contrived crap.


I remember watching AOTC, and I was very confused during the scene with Obi-Wan in the diner talking to that fat alien...for a moment, I couldn't comprehend what was going on. Somehow, Lucas thought it would be a good idea to shoehorn in a fat, greasy alien who picks at himself as a supposed friend to Obi-Wan, with no build up whatsoever.

God damn, the more I think about that film, the angrier I get.
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Originally posted by: GoldStone9


Does anyone ever fall to sleep when watching AOTC?
.


I went to all 3 PT movies with 2 friends of mine I grew up with, and sadly one of them fell asleep during the AOTC, and that is when I started to question, "What the hell is going on with these movies?" The next day in work I asked a co-worker what he thought of AOTC, "UHHHH, that was the most boring SW film I have ever seen!" I also remember people were laughing during the fireplace scene in the theater, and of course that is not suppose to be a comedic moment in the movie as Anakin & Padme share their true feelings in probably one of the most awkward scenes of the 6.

AOTC was the real turning point in the SW fandom when a good bit of OT fans kinda gave up, cause I just never saw that emotion of waiting for ROTS during 2005 the same way I did with most of my friends with TPM & AOTC. I think people got burned twice, and the battlelines were drawn at the point of bashers/gushers.

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I think the WORST of AOTC is when Anakin was kissing Padme after giving us "sand is coarse" speech and the music is going and then everything stops:

"ANAKIN kisses PADMÉ. She doesn't resist. She comes to her senses and pulls away.
PADMÉ: No, I shouldn't have done that.
ANAKIN: I'm sorry. When I'm around you, my mind is no longer my own.
He looks at her."

Such drivel, just looking at Hayden's facial reaction is freaking hillarious since its so bad.
and this was on par:

"ANAKIN: You are so beautiful!
PADME: It's only because I'm so in love . . .
ANAKIN: No, it's because I'm so in love with you.
PADME: So love has blinded you?
ANAKIN: Well, that's not exactly what I meant . . .
PADME: But it's probably true!
They laugh.
ANAKIN: I haven't laughed in so long . . .
PADME: Neither have I."

Just think, this could have been the conversation in "Empire Strikes Back" with Han and Leia.

Another thing that disappointed me to no end was the scene in ROTS where Dooku is close to being killed by Anakin's two lightsabers. If anyone has heard the Book-on-tape of the ROTS novel, the scene was just perfect, you really feel and understand the tremendous emotions going through Dooku's head since he finally has found out that he was being duped the entire time by Sidious/Palp.

You get NOTHING in the movie, just one nervous glance. And then two seconds later, Anakin is already saying ~ "I shouldn't have done that".

No end to what was wrong with the PT. The only thing the PT did for me was to put "Star Wars" in perspective.
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Originally posted by: C3PX
Originally posted by: vote_for_palpatine
Yeah, I'm going to end this exchange in this post. Bear in mind that I was not the one who began the putdown fest, so don't go playing the poor tortured victim here. I don't get preemptively snarky with anyone,...

Uh, dude, if you didn't start this putdown fest, then who did? Your memory isn't that great either, fortunately on message boards all things are recorded, check out your preemptive snarkiness posted on Sunday, November 11, 2007 at 1:01 AM.

The first bit of snarkiness came from you with your (totally unfounded) attack on my usage of English. My first post in this thread came before that, and I attacked no one.

I hate hate hate that I keep having to restate and retype and rehash these things, but it seems like you're either not reading what I wrote or not comprehending it.


... and in fact my first post on this topic had nothing to do with you. To be fair, maybe that's what you thought because my first post came right after a post of yours.


To be fair, maybe I thought that not only because your first post in this exchange came right after my own, but consisted entirely of a quote by quote from my post,


Bull fucking shit. THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.

Here, let me post that ten more times so that maybe you'll see it.

THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.
THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.
THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.
THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.
THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.
THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.
THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.
THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.
THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.
THE VERY FIRST POST I MADE IN THIS THREAD DID NOT QUOTE ANYBODY.

My first post in this thread was on page one, it was the eleventh post, dated Saturday, November 10th, 2007, at 10:16 PM.

which included some slightly "snarky" comments about some of the things I had said, to which I responded "snarkily" only to your "snarky" bits and left the rest respectful. I may have been a bit harsh on your "Yoda/Chinese speak", but you yourself were using it as a way of putdown.


"Well, to pose a question you posed earlier, So what? Sets and puppets do not a movie make - just as CGI does not a movie make."


There was the original comment I made which prompted your "Yoda/Chinese" comment. What in the blue hell is harsh about this?!? Get the goddamn sand out of your twat.

Anyway, my mistake was responding to an exessive quote-and-address-every-sentence response,


To be accurate (which doesn't seem to concern you very much), your mistake was to start it, not in responding to it.

Want to book yourself or a guest on THE VFP Show? PM me!

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Dude, we really ought to quit while we still have some small amount of dignity left in the eyes of our fellow forum members. Over and out.

"Every time Warb sighs, an angel falls into a vat of mapel syrup." - Gaffer Tape

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Originally posted by: GoldStone9
I think the WORST of AOTC is when Anakin was kissing Padme after giving us "sand is coarse" speech and the music is going and then everything stops:


To me, the worst moments were the robot-factory scene with 3PO getting his head ripped off, etc., and the CGI Yoda pulling out his lightsaber and doing back-flips. I could not BELIEVE what I was watching.

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Well, besides the implausibility of 3PO's head and body to be able to work independently of one another, I think that whole premise might have been humorous if not for the atrocious lines of dialogue they had him say during it. Complain all you want to about Anakin and Padme, the really horribly scriptwriting in that movie is definitely directed at that poor droid: "I'm scrap!" "I'm quite beside myself!" "This is such a drag!" Ugh! Made me wonder if they were trying to make the audience groan. So pathetically written, so forced at humor, so out of character, and so out of universe when you start throwing in pop culture slang! The only two one-liners I actually enjoyed were, "I'm so confused!" and, to a slightly lesser degree, "I'm programmed for etiquette, not destruction!"

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Originally posted by: Gaffer Tape
The only two one-liners I actually enjoyed were, "I'm so confused!" and, to a slightly lesser degree, "I'm programmed for etiquette, not destruction!"


Yes, the "I'm programmed for etiquette!" line is the only one that actually comes from 3P0's character and thats why its funny--its simply the character responding to the situation he's in and the result is humorous, and this is how you write humor. 3P0 would be horrified to discover his dissassembled body is used for combat. The other stuff like "what a drag"--that was just thrown in there, out of character, out of universe, and awkward in its arbitrariness. To me those lines weren't as annoying as the Anakin-Padme stuff--I mean those are just throw-away lines, gags that you forget about 2 seconds later. The Anakin-Padme stuff was the core of both the entire characters and the story of the PT, and people were laughing their heads off in the theater--a failure of equal preportion to the success of the original film. I am still struggling to comprehend how such shit ended up being made. I mean this is the heart of the story--and Anakin is pouring his heart out. And we laughed! We laughed not only at the absurdity of the writing but that this was being passed off with sincerity by a supposed professional! I mean it was worse than high school dramas, without hyperbole--the thing feels like it was written and directed by a 12 year old. Yeah, cool scenes of stuff exploding and people fighting with swords, but not that exciting cause theres no dramatic structure--but characters that ring as true as one would expect from a boy who had never had social contact and gotten all his experience from reading third-rate 1950's comics. Theres an emotional immaturity in AOTC thats embarrassing, really, because the characters are not characters, they are just actors reading from a script.