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Return of the Jedi Script Game — Page 3

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Yoda: That face you make. Look I so old to young eyes?

Luke: No, of course not.

Yoda: Yes I do. Yes I do. Sick have I become. Old and weak. When 900 years old you reach, look as good you will not, hmm? Soon will I rest, yes. Forever sleep. Earned it I have.

Luke: Master Yoda, you can't die.

Yoda: Strong am I with the Force, but not that strong. Twilight is upon me, and soon night must fall. That is the way of things.

Luke: But I need your help. I've come back to finish the training.

Yoda: No more training you require. Already know that which you need.

Luke: Then I am a Jedi.

Yoda: Oh, heh-heh-cough. Not yet. One thing remains. Vader. You must confront Vader. Then, only then, a Jedi will you be.

Luke: Master Yoda, is Darth Vader my father?

Yoda: Hmm, rest I need. Yes...

Luke: Yoda, I must know.

Yoda: Your father he is. Told you, did he?

Luke: Yes.

Yoda: Unexpected this is. And unfortunate.

Luke: Unfortunate that I know the truth.

Yoda: No. Unfortunate that you rushed to face him. That incomplete was your training. That not ready for the burden you were.

Luke: Sorry.

(Whew. That's all I have right now. I'm afraid I'll get Yoda's death words mixed up, so I'll let someone else do the honors. I'll nail Obi-Wan and Mon Mothma's lines later on...)
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This is a long one, but it's one of my favourite scenes in the whole trilogy - Frank Oz and Mark Hamill both deserve an oscar for this scene alone.


Yoda: Hmm. That face you make. Look I so old to young eyes?

Luke: No, of course not.

Yoda: I do, yes, I do! Sick have I become. Old and weak. When nine hundred years old you reach, look as good you
will not. Hmm? Soon will I rest. Yes, forever sleep. Earned it, I have.

Luke: Master Yoda, you can't die.

Yoda: Strong am I with the Force... but not that strong! Twilight is upon me and soon night must fall. That is the way of things ... the way of the Force.

Luke: But I need your help. I've come back to complete the training.

Yoda: No more training do you require. Already know you that which you need.

Luke: Then I am a Jedi?

Yoda: Ohhh. Not yet. One thing remains: Vader. You must confront Vader. Then, only then, a Jedi will you be. And confront him you will.

Luke: Master Yoda... is Darth Vader my father?

Yoda: Mmm... rest I need. Yes... rest.

Luke: Yoda, I must know.

Yoda: Your father he is. Told you, did he?

Luke: Yes.

Yoda: Unexpected this is, and unfortunate...

Luke: Unfortunate that I know the truth?

Yoda: No. Unfortunate that you rushed to face him... that incomplete was your training. Not ready for the burden were you.

Luke: Well, I'm sorry.

Yoda: Remember, a Jedi's strength flows from the Force. But beware. Anger, fear, aggression. The dark side are they. Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny. Luke...Luke...Do not...Do not underestimate the powers of the Emperor, or suffer your father's fate, you will. Luke, when gone am I, the last of the Jedi will you be. Luke, the Force runs strong in your family. Pass on what you have learned, Luke... There is... another...Sky...Sky...walker.

Yoda disappears, a single tear trickles down YIYF's cheek.


War does not make one great.

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LUKE
I can't do it, Artoo. I can't go on alone.

BEN
Yoda will always be with you.

LUKE
Obi-Wan! Why didn't you tell me? You told me Vader betrayed and murdered my father.

BEN
You father was seduced by the dark side of the Force. He ceased to be Anakin Skywalker and became Darth Vader. When that happened, the good man who was your father was destroyed. So what I have told you was true... from a certain point of view.

LUKE
A certain point of view!

BEN
Luke, you're going to find that many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view.

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Ben: Anakin was a good friend. When I first knew him, your father was already a great pilot, but I was amazed at how strongly the Force was with him. I took it upon myself to train him as a Jedi. I thought I could instruct him just as well as Yoda. I was wrong.
Luke: There is still good in him.
Ben: He's more machine now than man, twisted and evil.

Come on, guys. Let's take it a little easier on these transcriptions, or else this movie is going to be over before we know it!

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Luke:I can't do it, Ben.

OB1:You cannot escape your destiny. You must face Darth Vader again!


(I think we should do just 2 lines per post, that may make the Script last longer. IMO)
§ JxF §
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Luke: I can't kill my own father.
Ben: Then the Emperor has already won. You were our only hope.

And, as my last post indicates, I agree.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Originally posted by: Gaffer Tape
Come on, guys. Let's take it a little easier on these transcriptions, or else this movie is going to be over before we know it!
I agree, but I just had to do the whole Yoda death scene, and I explained why. This movie is pretty lame from now until the Emperor and Luke scenes at the end, so I'm all for a 2 or 3 line limit.

Ben Kenobi: To protect you both from the Emperor, you were hidden from your father when you were born. The Emperor knew, as I did, if
Anakin were to have any offspring, they would be a threat to him. That is the reason why your sister remains safely anonymous.

War does not make one great.

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Well, I wouldn't say the movie's that bad. But, anyway...

Luke: Leia! Leia's the contrived plot device the writer pulled out of his ass, I mean... my sister!
Ben: Your insight serves you well. Bury your feelings deep down, Luke. They do you credit, but they could be made to serve the Emperor.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Originally posted by: Gaffer Tape
Well, I wouldn't say the movie's that bad. But, anyway...
I actually wrote 'shit' but then realised I wasn't being fair and changed it to 'lame', but rather than delete 'shit' I added 'Lame', which meant I was now calling the movie 'shit lame' which it most definitely isn't. I think 'Lame' is fair though, so I edited my post. I'll stop talking now.

I think the next line is in the rebel meeting room, but if I'm wrong, sorry:

Han: Well look at you, a General, huh? (seems like any old scoundrel can become a General in the rebel alliance with little or no effort).

War does not make one great.

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Except Wedge, apparently...

Lando: Someone must have told them about my little maneuver at the Battle of Tanab.
Han: Well, don't look at me, pal. I just told them you were a fair pilot. I didn't know they were looking for somebody to lead this crazy attack.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Apparently nobody told the powers that be within the alliance that Wedge was a 'fair pilot', otherwise he would have made General in a heartbeat.

Lando: I'm surprised they didn't ask you to do it.

Han: Well, who says they didn't. But I ain't crazy. You're the respectable one, remember?

War does not make one great.

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It also seems rather odd how easily Luke was put in charge of a squadron at the Battle of Yavin over his more experienced wingmen. I guess that's simply because of Biggs's "best bush pilot" statement. I bet he's kicking himself in heaven now! "Damnit, I should have said I was the best, and maybe I wouldn't have died!"

Mon Mothma: The Emperor's made a critical error, and the time for our attack has come.

EDIT: Oh, wait. I remember more of that line!

Mon Mothma: The data brought to us by the Bothan spies has pinpointed the exact location of this new Death Star. We also know that the weapon systems on this Death Star are not yet operation. But most important of all, we have learned that the Emperor himself is personally overseeing the final stages of construction. Admiral Ackbar please.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Didnt she say, many bothans died to bring this information, or something like that? Or is it later?
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
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Aaaaaaah! Yeah! Stupid me! This isn't even one of those things I forgot! I was thinking about that line as I was writing, and I just skipped over it!

Mon Mothma: ...Many Bothans died to bring us this information. Admiral Ackbar, please.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Sure, we believe you...

Ackbar: You can see here the Death Star orbiting the forest Moon of Endor. Although the weapon systems on this Death Star are not yet
operational, the Death Star does have a strong defense mechanism. It is protected by an energy shield, which is generated from the
nearby forest Moon. The shield must be deactivated if any attack is to be attempted. Once the shield is down, our cruisers will create a perimeter, while the fighters fly into the superstructure and attempt to knock out the main reactor. It's basically a repeat of what we did at Yavin, except we're going all the way in this time and the special effects will be better. General Calrissian has volunteered to lead
the fighter attack.

War does not make one great.

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Han: Good luck. You're gonna need it.

Or, Smash TV wise...

M.C.: GOOD LUCK!! YOU'LL NEED IT!

TOTAL CARNAGE! I LOVE IT!

BIG MONEY! BIG PRIZES! I LOVE IT!

Sorry. Got carried away.

Ackbar: General Nadine...
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It's General Madine, actually.

Madine: We have stolen a small Imperial shuttle. Disgusied as a cargo ship, a strike team will land on the moon and deactivate the shield generator.
Leia: I wonder who they found to pull that off?
Madine: General Solo, is your strike team assembled?

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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(small lines missed: Madine said: And using a secret Imperial code, ..)
(and Mon Mothma also said: With the Imperial fleed spread throughout the galaxy in a vain effort to engage us, it is relatively unprotected.)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Back to the program..

Han:Uh, my team's ready. but i don't have a command crew for the shuttle.

Chewy: Arrrrrgg!

Han:It's gonna be rough, pal, I didn't want to speak for you. ... That's one.
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Leia: General? Count me in.
Luke: I'm with you too!
Leia: What is it?
Luke: Ask me again sometime. Han. Chewie.
3PO: Exciting is hardly the word I would choose.

I know I did five lines, but they're so short and hardly exciting, I figured I was doing you guys a favor by getting them out of the way.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Han: Look. I want you to take her. I mean it. Take her. You need all the help you can get. She's the fastest ship in the fleet.

Lando: All right, old buddy. You know, I know what she means to you. I'll take good care of her. She won't get a scratch. All right?

War does not make one great.

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The forced witty banter between Han and Lando to make us believe their deep friendship is almost as bad as the dialogue between Anakin and Obi-Wan in the prequels. But not quite - at least here I believe they Han and Lando have a history.

Lando: Good luck.

Han: You, too.

You just know they want to hug but are way too tough and manly to do so.

War does not make one great.

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Leia: Hey, you awake?
Han: I just got a funny feeling--like I'm not gonna see her again (although if my friend driving her dies, I don't really care apparently).
Leia: Come on, General. Let's move.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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Han: Right. Chewie, let's see what this piece of junk can do. Ready, everybody?

Luke: All set.

3PO: Here we go again.

Han: All right, hang on.

War does not make one great.