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Zombies and Jedi

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If Lucas wanted to make the ultimate Star Wars movie, he'd throw some zombies into the mix. Throughtout the 2 trilogys, how often do we actually see lightsabers cutting through something organic? Only 5 or 6 times, and even then, the actual cut is usually offscreen.

Seeing a few jedi hack their way through a horde of zombies is worth triple admission price to me. And just that opens doors to zombie jedi and jedi zombies.

Of course, Lucas would screw all up with digital blood and illplaced burp jokes. But I can still dream.
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You know you'd go see it.
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It has always bugged my how those lightsabers work differently in the Star Wars trilogy. One moment Obi-Wan chops off an aliens arm in Ep.4 and Vader chops off Luke´s hand in ESB... and then we have Luke on the sail barge chopping all over the place in ROTJ and nothing ever happens to the victims, no arms or legs get chopped off even though he slashes at them directly - they are just "pushed slightly" and fall into the Sarlacc. And then in the same movie he cuts off the front end of a speeder bike with ease! How can this be? Can´t there be some sense of continuity in this for christ sake?

peace,

Rebelscum
peace,

Rebelscum
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It all comes pack to gore, which doesn't really go hand in hand with PG movies. Even in R movies for that matter, thanks to our friends the MPAA.
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If Lucas wanted to make the ultimate Star Wars movie, he'd throw some zombies into the mix.


Please, don't get Lucas any more ideas, or by next year these Zombies will be part Lucas' "original vision".

"I'm sorry that some fans choose to ignore my vision, but it's obvious that Jedi Zombies were left out due to technical constraints" - Lucas

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I suppose so. I can just imagine how George would try to twist zombies into a kid market.
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The plot:



STAR WARS

Episode XXVII Attack of the Zombies

It is a Dark Time for the Galactic Federation of Free Alliances.
Human invaders from the distant galaxy Milky way have accidentally
contaminated the ancinet graveyards of the Jedi with a Virus that reanimates dead bodies.
A group of Jedi, under the command of Han Organa Durron Solo Antilles Craken Skywalker have bent sent to apprehend the creator of this virus, William Birkin, and bring him to a Lightsaber-style Justice

4

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I'll write the script and you get me a few million. Then we'll be in business.
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Of course, I'd write it so the first 5 minutes sets up the story, leaving the final 2 hours open for zombie carnage. You'd think it get boring after awhile, but it wouldn't. Believe me, it wouldn't.
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Didn't they sort of have Jedi zombies in the video games? Seriously, I could swear I remember fighting some "undead Sith" or something like that in one of the Jedi Knight first-person shooter games.
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Originally posted by: Rebelscum
It has always bugged my how those lightsabers work differently in the Star Wars trilogy.

That's bugged me too: Like the bloody arm-severings of the Wampa and that guy in the cantina, but then you can chop off someone's head with no blood at all. Maybe hairy arms interfere with the cauterizing effect for some reason.
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I'm sure they did, but I doubt they were the "BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS" type zombies. That's what I want. Return of the Living Dead type stuff.
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Those are the best kind of Zombie.

P.S. Im glad somebody mentioned the blood from lightsaber wounds. That was just a major brain fart...which could have been turned into comic relief by Lucas...not the event, the brain fart itself, haha...fart.



P.P.S. Farts are funny.
"You don't own space, so stop actin' like you do."
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Burp and fart jokes are comic gold.

Why when I see a fart joke on tv, I laugh for hours on end and think to myself, where do those writers get their ideas! Brilliance in action, people.
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Peee-yoosa! (come on someone had to say it!)


hey Zombie lover why not just go rent Resident Evil (zombies ain't that interesting)
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I don't know why, but I feel like GL could do an excelent western-spaghetti film with a low budget and no CGI. That way we would enjoy seeing the villain characters shooting first.

Hehe no I'm serious, he could really pull it of. I think he can make excelent non-star wars films if he wishes to.
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
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Hehe no I'm serious, he could really pull it of. I think he can make excelent non-star wars films if he wishes to.


Trust me, if Lucas ever released a non-SW movie, it would sink at the box office. The guy has no talent left, only an incredibly valuable license he is running into the ground.
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Originally posted by: Sam_Lu
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Hehe no I'm serious, he could really pull it of. I think he can make excelent non-star wars films if he wishes to.


Trust me, if Lucas ever released a non-SW movie, it would sink at the box office. The guy has no talent left, only an incredibly valuable license he is running into the ground.


I don't think so. I belive he has stressed out the SW franchise in a way that he can't make a good movie with it anymore. And I still belive he could do a pretty decent flick if he avoids using CGI on it.
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
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And I still belive he could do a pretty decent flick if he avoids using CGI on it.


So who's going to cut both his hands off?
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buddy x-wing, Resident Evil isn't exactly the king of zombie movies. If that's all you've seen, then I understand your viewpoint. Watch some better ones, and I think you'll see the good in the genre.
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Originally posted by: Zombie Chewbacca
I'm sure they did, but I doubt they were the "BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS" type zombies. That's what I want. Return of the Living Dead type stuff.



EXT. GRAVEYARD

PADME, dyed red hair and fishnet's, is naked, rubbing against ANAKIN'S leg and grabbing his crotch, clearly ignoring every word he is saying.

ANAKIN: Nobody understands me, y'know?!? I fuckin' bust my ass for the Jedi Order, and what do I get? "You're wreckless!" Fuck them, fuck them all!!

PADME: I like it wreckless!

ANAKIN: I mean, I got somethin' to say, y'know? What do you think this is all about, you think this is about fuckin' midichlorians? This is a way of life!

PADME: Oh yes!
For as much as some people claim to hate what Star Wars has become, they sure seem incapable of shutting up about it.
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YES!!! That storyline works on so many levels, it's almost too good.
"90% of the statistics used in quotes are made up."
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Heheheh, I would love to see a character to say "fuck you!" loudly in ROTS. I wouldn't be so happy if it was directed to the camera, at the end of the movie.
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering