This past year I did one of those DNA tests to see what it said about my ancestry. I was surprised by what it said about half of my ancestry. Then I clicked a link to show “DNA matches” and was greeted at the top of the page with “[Luke], [-----] is your father.”
I didn’t know the name. I didn’t know the site could even tell me such a thing.
One time, a few years ago, I met a guy who I believed to be my father. So there are no hurt feelings for me on that point.
I confirmed the DNA result with my mother - who long thought it possible (you don’t say!). But he had no knowledge of me, given the circumstances. I could see he later married and has a family of his own.
I messaged him on the site, knowing he could also see the DNA match on his page if he looked. I said I know it must be a shock for him and I would leave it up to him what to do next. I sort of expected/hoped for a response but nothing after more than 6 months.
Even though he did nothing wrong, having a son show up out of nowhere could be disruptive. I want to be sensitive to his situation but I want to know about him, the family he came from. I’m afraid of total rejection. I get tempted to contact him again and then I don’t know what to write.
The blue elephant in the room.