Sign In

Diamonds Are Forever: The Next Link in the Pipeline - fan edit

Replies
7
Author
Time

Many think DAF is a poor Bond film, and it has a lot wrong with it - bad dialogue, plot holes galore, a story that’s all over the place, but there are also a lot of cool things in there (Wint and Kidd for starters). I’ve done an edit that re-inserts some deleted scenes (at least one of which explains one otherwise baffling scene tha occurs later on) and removed the ridiculous plot device of there being numerous Blofelds as well as other little bits that irked me. The full list of changes are below:

  • I’ve cut the bikini strangling scene (never sat well with me)
  • Edited the dialogue by Sir Donald by a tad so he doesn’t keep repeating himself - removed the second occurrence of “prides itself on the loyalty and devotion of its workers”
  • Sammy Davis Jr scene inserted - nice to see that SPECTRE has influence in the world of showbiz!
  • Wint and Kidd killing Shady Tree scene inserted
  • Dinner with Plenty O’Toole scene inserted - doesn’t add much to the narrative - but this is an alternative movie and it’s nice to see!
  • Plenty returns to the apartment scene inserted - without this it doesn’t make sense as to why she’s at Tiffany’s house later in the film
  • Tiffany being stalked by the CIA, I have cut down this scene to remove the Elephant on the slot machine and the woman changing into a Gorilla (I mean, WTF?!!) we now just see Tiffany give them the slip as they chase after her
  • “Keep tootin’ on that hooter Charlie, and you’ll get a shot in the mouth!” line removed as Tiffany is really annoying in this scene
  • Through the Alley scene - replaced shot of car on two wheels coming out the alley the right way up!
  • Bond and Tiffany at the Whyte House extended scene inserted
  • Blofeld’s double is cut. Now, when Bond enters the Whyte House penthouse, he sees Blofeld, Blofeld pulls a gun on him and ushers Bond into the lift. The plastic surgery double thing is mentioned in the very first scene of the film, so when we get to this point and see Blofeld is alive, we can assume Bond killed a double at the beginning of the movie. It’s hard to believe the Blofeld double plot-line, but it’s even worse when you see them on screen together. The exposition about using Willard Whyte’s empire as cover is repeated later on in the film so you don’t miss it here, and we also lose the voice changing technology that beggars belief. I know its used later on when Bond is pretending to be Saxby, but it doesn’t jar as much and besides, Q is there operating it so we just assume its another of his gadgets
  • Missile explosion in North Dakota and of the Soviet Submarine replaced with stock footage due to the ropey special effects in the original movie
  • The shot of the Chinese airbase being blown up by the satellite removed due to the appalling green screen shot of the Chinese guy on fire - the sequence flows just as well without it
  • Fight with Bambi and Thumper shortened to prevent it being quite so silly - the gymnastics are too over the top - now, Bond gets kneed in the groin, thrown across the room then into the pool
  • Shots of helicopters blowing up removed - the effects are really, really bad in those two shots and the film looks better for them not being there
  • Tiffany falling off the oil rig due to firing a machine gun shot removed - she’s too tough and sassy throughout the movie for her to suddenly appear like a bimbo

I’ve had to re-insert soundtrack music and add new sound effects as a lot of the deleted footage is silent and also so that you won’t notice the joins…

Author
Time

Hmmm. Nearly the worst Bond films (I’m told Spectre is officially the worst). I’m intrigued.

DaF really does need help and a few of those deleted scenes fill plot holes.
I wouldn’t mind seeing some cuts with regards to Wint and Hidd though. They are god awful villains and drag the film down whenever they’re on screen.

Dr. M

Author
Time

SPECTRE has divided opinion - I liked it. That’s the thing with Bond, it hops between several styles as the films go on - they all divide opinion to some degree. But you’d have to go a long way to beat Die Another Day as the worst (IMO)

Author
Time

Billy Bumbags said:

SPECTRE has divided opinion - I liked it. That’s the thing with Bond, it hops between several styles as the films go on - they all divide opinion to some degree. But you’d have to go a long way to beat Die Another Day as the worst (IMO)

And yet I liked Die Another Day. I thought it was a big silly love letter to the franchise on its anniversary.

Dr. M

Author
Time

I would have liked it more without the CGI. I didn’t mind the plot or the silliness, just missed something for me. Different strokes and all that!

Author
Time

Diamonds was the first of the Connery Bond films I saw, and I loved it. I still enjoy it quite a bit, but after seeing the first 3 Bond films, it does pale in comparison. Though I still like it better than Thunderball.

"The other versions will disappear. Even the 35 million tapes of Star Wars out there won’t last more than 30 or 40 years. A hundred years from now, the only version of the movie that anyone will remember will be the DVD version [of the Special Edition], and you’ll be able to project it on a 20’ by 40’ screen with perfect quality. I think it’s the director’s prerogative, not the studio’s to go back and reinvent a movie." - George Lucas

<span> </span>

Author
Time

I’d love to see this fan edit of Diamonds Are Forever, the description sounds very interesting.

Could someone please tell me where I can find it, thanks!

Author
Time

sounds good. where will you be sharing this?

To the top