I probably am aiming for that level for neutrality. If they decide to become Christians, their Christianity must be their own. Maybe I’m wrong, but it seems like young kids are too young to make these kind of decisions. Some young kids only join a church because their sunday school gives out pizza every week.
I agree important choices should be made by adults, but I guess it’s the atheist in me that wonders if religion qualifies as an important choice (probably could have been phrased better, really not intended as flamebait, honest). I mean, as long as you’re a decent, kind, generous, loving person, does it really matter at all if you’re a Presbyterian or a Zoroastrian? Not to be too flippant, but that decision pretty much just dictates where you hang out on weekends, and whether you eat pork, right? I think what you may be worried about is that your own experience is that religion is some all-consuming thing that colors your world and alters the course of your life. But for lots of people, religion is pretty benign – nice even – and not a significant differentiator between them and other people. It’s a little zest in the bland modern world, a little cultural identity that they can call home. Whether or not they got it through a conscious and informed choice… isn’t actually that big of a deal.
And fair warning – everyone has biases (see above for mine 😉 ), your kids will inherit your biases, and if you’re lucky, your kids will call you out on them when they grow up. Neutrality is a very noble goal, but there’s nothing as infuriating as a parent who claims to be totally, completely neutral when they’re not. Try to be upfront about your own biases, like “you know, I’m not really the best person to ask about brand X Christianity because my own parents were brand X, and it was a really awful experience for me”.