I likes lot of what you have done. Looks good.
I still think from a story telling standpoint that the Krennic/Erso scene in the beginning is better suited as A dream for Jyn as she is on board with Cassian. Start the film with the Death Star cone scene. It removes all time jumps that way. Just cut up the scene into flashes and recolor it like Rey’s force vision or Anakin’s vision.